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Capt_Obvious

Offline (the 10/27/2014 at 6:27pm) | Search for a member

Capt_Obvious

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6326
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Capt_Obvious : Gamer, Grammar NAZI, Sarcastic . . . That's about all you need to know.

Capt_Obvious's page activity

Visits<b>Michaelmore</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 5:20am<b>pikawarriors</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 11:53pm<b>lochiamochia</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 10:21pm<b>katyliz91</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 9:45pm<b>Ghosty546</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 2:50am<b>mominzed</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 1:22am<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 8:08am<b>Anata</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 5:06am<b>boobear19883</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 1:14am<b>Zenic032797</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 8:25pm<b>kidinkbaby</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 4:01am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 1:50am<b>Amber_Naomy</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 12:27am<b>violetsweety</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 11:24pm<b>tcmxo</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 11:06pm<b>RainbowxxVeinsx</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 11:03pm<b>Martyna0611</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 10:27pm<b>depressed_child</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 9:50pm

Capt_Obvious's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Capt_Obvious's badges

Capt_Obvious's favorite FMLs

Today, at my apartment complex, I was carrying a bag of trash up to the dumpster. A guy stopped his car and helped me carry it the rest of the way. I thanked him and he asked me out. I explained that I was married. He grabbed the trash bag and carried it back to my apartment. FML

#21285821
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35052) - you deserved it (3651)

On 10/26/2014 at 6:46pm - love - by mellielynnemily - United States

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

#21282836
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32190) - you deserved it (3357)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm - work - by Australian Lifeguard - United States (Arizona)

Today, I volunteered to tutor a 17-year-old girl in science. I had to explain in detail of what the real Big Bang theory was, as she only knew about the show. Later, I heard I was reported by her because apparently, "I was trying to convert her to Scientology." I now know why she needed a tutor. FML

Today, I caught my 15-year-old son trying to roll catnip into a joint and smoke it. FML

#21281464
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31687) - you deserved it (4322)

On 10/19/2014 at 11:48pm - kids - by Bad Dad - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML

#21281207
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30153) - you deserved it (4755)

On 10/19/2014 at 4:58pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML

#21280696
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35729) - you deserved it (3575)

On 10/18/2014 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend jerking off to what I thought was porn on his phone. He was actually beating it to Siri's voice. FML

#21280577
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35763) - you deserved it (3415)

On 10/18/2014 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by fizzie101 - United States (California)

Today, my wife yelled at me for being a bastard and not caring about her needs. I felt like an asshole and apologized for everything. It took me a few hours to realize I'd basically just apologized for unknowingly hanging the toilet paper the "wrong way" for her OCD. FML

#21279154
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33676) - you deserved it (4895)

On 10/16/2014 at 3:30pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I watched from my office window as a couple maneuvered their car to squash a dead pigeon flat on the road. I then watched as they got out of the car, set up tripods and started taking photos of it. FML

Today, it's the first birthday of the condom in my pocket. FML

#21276832
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37660) - you deserved it (7248)

On 10/13/2014 at 10:15am - intimacy - by badplacerightnow (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

#21276776
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33356) - you deserved it (4547)

On 10/13/2014 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Drafrica (woman) - South Africa

Today, I found out that I am "un-promotable" to the job that I have been promised for the last two years because, I "don't suffer idiots well." Idiots. FML

Today, my co-worker spent the afternoon taking online personality quizzes and messaging everyone the results. She was particularly proud of one which told her she was a hard-working overachiever. My boss walked by just as the message for that one popped up and I got in trouble for slacking off. FML

#21273209
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28637) - you deserved it (2534)

On 10/07/2014 at 11:15pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a girl puked on me. No warnings, nothing. She just threw up on me, then walked off like nothing even happened. FML

#21271247
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39391) - you deserved it (2493)

On 10/05/2014 at 1:48pm - health - by Eww - United States (Oregon)



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