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CaptNomNom

Offline (the 12/04/2014 at 12:34am) | Search for a member

CaptNomNom

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 8 July 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1134
  • Number of comments : 82
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About CaptNomNom : Im getting fatter and fatter but I'm probably still thinner than you. Hahahaha.

Add me on twitter @CaptNomNom

CaptNomNom's page activity

Visits<b>bellabuns</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 5:38pm<b>winchestinalock</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 12:09pm<b>Andrew6499</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 10:03pm<b>grantk123</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 10:14pm<b>justdausualtf</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 2:41pm<b>Spetz14</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 6:34am<b>ally_sanderson</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 10:25am<b>DenBriZel</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 3:43am<b>kittykittycat2</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 6:17pm<b>KitchKraft</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 1:43pm<b>Vanshikap</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 9:24pm<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 9:23pm<b>blazie999</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 9:07pm<b>TBGC</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 6:49am<b>cakefete2</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 5:57am<b>star14394</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 3:38am<b>Nevracceptdefeat</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 12:43am<b>ClayDude365</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 9:17pm

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CaptNomNom's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband asked me to show him my boob. I began to pull the side of my shirt down when he said, "No, not that one, the big one." FML

#20472081
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42002) - you deserved it (4284)

On 01/21/2013 at 9:27pm - intimacy - by sarah6786 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a senile old lady came up to me and offered me chocolate. I noticed that it was ex-lax, so I politely told her no. My 4-year-old daughter pushed me aside and ate the ex-lax, because she thought it was candy. I now have a stinky child on a 3 hour bus ride, with no stops. FML

#20197580
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20572) - you deserved it (9804)

On 12/09/2012 at 11:29am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was eating a fancy dinner with my girlfriend at a restaurant. Suddenly, my ex-girlfriend, who was seemingly still angry after our breakup 2 years ago, saw me through the window. She walked in, took my spaghetti dinner, shoved it in my face, and stormed out. FML

#20148447
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25259) - you deserved it (2998)

On 11/05/2012 at 2:02am - love - by sad (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my grandmother was driving me to the mall. Suddenly, she stopped in the middle of the road. When I asked her what exactly she was doing, she said, "Oh, am I driving?" FML

#19685712
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25858) - you deserved it (1836)

On 05/26/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by anonymus - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend gave birth to our first child. Our nurse was the lady I had a one night stand with 3 nights ago, and yes she remembered me. FML

#19584401
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13356) - you deserved it (169990)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:44pm - intimacy - by T3STI (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a chest x-ray. I thought everything was okay, that is until the tech gasped slightly and muttered, "Mother of God." I asked him what was wrong, and he kept insisting he had no idea what I was talking about. Now I'm so upset I can't even sleep. FML

#19564735
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30145) - you deserved it (2123)

On 05/02/2012 at 6:41pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I got some spam stating that I'd have no love life in the coming 10 years if I didn't reply to it. So, no different to the last 10 years then. FML

#19556689
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19502) - you deserved it (2401)

On 05/01/2012 at 1:14am - love - by monkeywrench (woman) - United States

Today, I went to my Christian accountability partner from church to talk about continuing to maintain Christian values. We had sex. Oh, the irony. FML

#19409993
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8824) - you deserved it (37176)

On 04/05/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Badchristian (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a woman came into my work and yelled at me because no one told her the cake she had bought the week before was made of ice cream. She'd hidden it in the cupboard and it melted. I work in Dairy Queen. FML

#17940087
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29824) - you deserved it (2192)

On 10/09/2011 at 1:11am - work - by ab (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I learned the hard way that taking a 20 mile bike ride with my boyfriend's family the day after losing my virginity is the worst decision ever. FML

#17457202
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38902) - you deserved it (16250)

On 08/13/2011 at 2:58am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was following my girlfriend up the stairs, I was pretty sure I was going to get lucky. As I was almost up the set of stairs, she lifted her skirt and revealed to me that she wasn't wearing any panties. I fell backwards down the stairs. FML

#4275637
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43668) - you deserved it (18910)

On 08/04/2009 at 3:55am - love - by Ouchithurt (man) - United States (Indiana)



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