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CallMeBloo

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CallMeBloo
  • Town/Country : Ocala, United States
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Monday 28 July 1986 (27 years)
  • Number of visits : 2118
  • Number of comments : 163
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About CallMeBloo : I enjoy laughing at people who have had hilarious moments of shame, whether they deserve them or not.

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CallMeBloo's favorite FMLs

Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

#19042299
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6827) - you deserved it (48509)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm - work - by great - United States

Today, I had to have a serious talk with my boyfriend about his Miley Cyrus obsession. FML

#19008453
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24355) - you deserved it (3873)

On 02/06/2012 at 5:08am - love - by Madzison (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I showed off my new tattoo to my friends. Too bad it says "Walk Earless" now instead of "Walk Fearless." That's right, I'm now supporting Van Gogh. FML

#18997714
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11956) - you deserved it (25375)

On 02/05/2012 at 12:54am - misc - by inked - United States (Alabama)

Today, I tried to inconspicuously hock a loogie. It went down my bra. FML

#18993154
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5988) - you deserved it (27453)

On 02/04/2012 at 3:22pm - misc - by Courtney - Reserved

Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML

#18976293
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15363) - you deserved it (19658)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - India

Today, our school chorus went to a senior citizens' home. An elderly lady died during my solo. FML

#18964784
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40566) - you deserved it (3580)

On 01/31/2012 at 10:34pm - misc - by sorrygrandma - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was left at the altar. For the second time. By the same man. FML

#18949271
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30321) - you deserved it (54903)

On 01/30/2012 at 12:37am - love - by givingup (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my wife made a joke about the size of my package, so figuring all's fair in love and war, I bought some laxatives to prank her with. They took a lot longer to work than I thought, and I ended up lying in bed, listening to my wife shitting her guts out in the bathroom for over an hour. FML

#18929275
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6029) - you deserved it (48063)

On 01/27/2012 at 10:13pm - health - by smith (man) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I had to Google how to find the area of a circle. I'm working on my PhD in engineering. FML

#18928299
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8539) - you deserved it (29151)

On 01/27/2012 at 8:20pm - misc - by pirsquared (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I made a drunken bet with friends that I could pour lighter fluid on my hands, light it, and shake it out before I got burned. I lost. FML

#18922456
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4960) - you deserved it (44660)

On 01/27/2012 at 1:48am - health - by batsu (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my family had dinner with my future in-laws for the first time. After a bottle of wine to herself, my mother loudly insisted that I'm out of her will. Apparently, I "molest towels" and leave them to "fester for days" in my "den of depravity". I'm sure they'll give me their daughter now. FML

#18914939
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20810) - you deserved it (2481)

On 01/26/2012 at 9:49am - love - by The Towel Molester (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my husband bleached his hair so, "our future kids will have blond hair too." I'm already married to this guy. FML

#18904697
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28298) - you deserved it (5456)

On 01/25/2012 at 1:23am - misc - by dragonmirado (woman) - China

Today, the office tough guy learned how to use the fire extinguisher. On me. I wasn't on fire. FML

#18902746
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20008) - you deserved it (1979)

On 01/24/2012 at 9:58pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I didn't have plans on shaving my pubic hair. My girlfriend's braces thought otherwise. FML

#18899300
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16772) - you deserved it (33891)

On 01/24/2012 at 3:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML

#18897054
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21662) - you deserved it (6484)

On 01/24/2012 at 5:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)



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