CallMeBloo

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Offline (the 05/06/2015 at 1:41am)

CallMeBloo

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Monday 28 July 1986 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13397
  • Number of comments : 196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About CallMeBloo : I enjoy laughing at people who have had hilarious moments of shame, whether they deserve them or not.

CallMeBloo's page activity

Visits<b>Emmalyne606777</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 10:26pm<b>arrouz</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 3:52am<b>Klover1</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 5:23am<b>kaiboi702</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 6:15am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 10:02am<b>Wondermage</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 7:51pm<b>hebdbdbdb</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 11:56pm<b>Lars93</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 5:20pm<b>ricardof</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:55pm<b>killer0689</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:26pm<b>ironhead</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:24pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:00pm<b>whitelightning19</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 5:36pm<b>rowanrules41</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 8:57pm<b>Michaelmore</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 2:20pm<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 9:53am<b>shiny_shipper</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 8:44pm<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 7:35pm

CallMeBloo's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Tweet, tweet

You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we can understand why.

Seen it!

You’ve watched 5 FML videos on the website, and commented on them.

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CallMeBloo's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out the reason our toilet paper has been disappearing so fast recently isn't because my son is wanking like a gibbon as I first thought. He's just been using our shredder to make streamers out of the stuff, then hiding it all in a box in his closet. Fucking hell, son. FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2014 at 10:04am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend informed me that during the night, I shot up in bed and whimpered tearfully, "I don't have anything for the fancy-dress!" She also decided to share this with all our friends. I'm never going to live this down. FML

by joe rogan fucking sucks, dude / 04/27/2014 at 4:51pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I saw a cute guy and decided to say hi. As I started to think about things to talk about, one story in particular about a drummer who looked like Jesus stuck out in my mind. I was so nervous that instead of saying hi, I blurted out, "Some people look like Jesus!" and took off. FML

by wondercat40 / 04/24/2014 at 5:19pm / United States (Indiana) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. FML

by now have a cat / 04/24/2014 at 4:52pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, I learned that most teenagers would rather grab free candy from the broken vending machine than help the guy stuck underneath it get free. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2014 at 12:05am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out why my dad always treated me badly as a kid compared to my siblings. It's because I was conceived while my mom was cheating on him. On top of that, he made it clear that he still doesn't consider me a "real" part of the family. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2014 at 4:23pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, Facebook put something out that shows a video of your entire life on the website. A part of it showed your most popular status update. Mine was from when I got dumped at Christmas. FML

by BigLove / 02/04/2014 at 9:25pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, my boyfriend started whispering "blowjobbbb" into my ear while we were watching a movie. When I asked him what he was doing, he denied ever saying it and claimed it must have been a subliminal message in the movie. FML

by Subliminal message / 01/19/2014 at 6:21pm / Switzerland / Intimacy

Today, my class was interrupted by flowers, balloons and chocolates. Then he sang to me a song he wrote himself. This was all for our one-year anniversary. It probably would have been the best day of my life... if I knew who he was. FML

by romance sucks. / 12/18/2013 at 4:20pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, in the small hours of the morning, my roommate's boyfriend kicked his foot through the thin wall separating our bedrooms during sex. They didn't even stop. FML

by BreakingTheMood / 11/13/2013 at 1:08pm / Finland (Southern Finland) / Intimacy

Today, during dinner, my mom told my dad and me in great detail about the "awesome" new cosmetic surgery idea she just had: constructing earlobes for lobeless ears, using skin taken from women's labia. I was forced to sit through this until I finished my plate. FML

by Champignon / 11/01/2013 at 10:17am / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Intimacy

Today, I put a picture of my cat on Facebook. A stranger sent me a message saying how "attractive" she was and that her eyes are "very seductive". So, basically, someone is trying to hit on my cat. FML

by meow / 10/30/2013 at 3:03am / United States / Animals

Today, I accidentally texted a picture of my cock to my dad. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2013 at 7:36pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I found tiny little maggots in the bristles of my toothbrush. I have no idea how long they've been there. FML

by wombats / 09/28/2013 at 10:38am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my 7-year-old son proudly announced that he had laid an egg during the night. I checked. He'd simply shat the bed. FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2013 at 4:49am / Kids