CallMeBloo

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Offline (the 05/06/2015 at 1:41am)

CallMeBloo

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Monday 28 July 1986 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13646
  • Number of comments : 196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About CallMeBloo : I enjoy laughing at people who have had hilarious moments of shame, whether they deserve them or not.

CallMeBloo's page activity

Visits<b>Emmalyne606777</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 10:26pm<b>arrouz</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 3:52am<b>Klover1</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 5:23am<b>kaiboi702</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 6:15am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 10:02am<b>Wondermage</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 7:51pm<b>hebdbdbdb</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 11:56pm<b>Lars93</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 5:20pm<b>ricardof</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:55pm<b>killer0689</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:26pm<b>ironhead</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:24pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:00pm<b>whitelightning19</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 5:36pm<b>rowanrules41</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 8:57pm<b>Michaelmore</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 2:20pm<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 9:53am<b>shiny_shipper</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 8:44pm<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 7:35pm

CallMeBloo's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Tweet, tweet

You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we can understand why.

Seen it!

You’ve watched 5 FML videos on the website, and commented on them.

See all of CallMeBloo's badges

CallMeBloo's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to repeatedly explain to an increasingly angry lady that no, she couldn't get an ultrasound by using a referral letter from her psychic. FML

by 360whoroscoped / 01/16/2015 at 1:05pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, I had to explain to my grandmother why, "What a nice singing voice! He doesn't sound black at all!" is not a compliment. FML

by Anonymous / 01/14/2015 at 2:18am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I had 'car sex'. It sucked and resulted in him masturbating into a McDonald's bag. FML

by briiiiiiii123 / 01/12/2015 at 2:56am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend was making lunch and asked me to pass her the peanut butter. I'll never know why, but as I handed it to her I said the first thing that came to mind: "I really want a dog." She looked at me in horror, then told me to get out of her house. FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2015 at 3:00pm / United States (Vermont) / Love

Today, one of my friends posted on Facebook saying if you're held up at an ATM, putting your PIN in backwards will alert the cops. I pointed out it's an urban legend, and asked how it'd work if their PIN was the same backwards. He drove over and beat the crap out of me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/07/2015 at 12:07pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Health

Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML

by Anonymous / 06/11/2014 at 6:20pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML

by MiserableMan / 06/10/2014 at 12:02am / Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh) / Love

Today, I used a public toilet. After I did my business in the stall and walked out, I was confronted by the sight of a man standing on tip-toes, holding his penis up to the automatic hand-dryer. Doubt I'll get that image out of my head any time soon. FML

by yepintheladiesroom / 06/07/2014 at 5:37pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, I fell down the stairs and broke my leg. My dad helped me to the car so he could drive me to the hospital, but when he saw our neighbor, he went over and had a 15 minute screaming match with him over how his dog keeps shitting on our lawn, all while I sat in the car in agony. FML

by wo-ow / 06/06/2014 at 7:09pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I got to explain to someone that "enjoying the warm, rich aromas of fecal matter" is not a good subject to use as an ice breaker for making friends. FML

by Aether / 06/03/2014 at 6:51pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandmother tried to start a fist-fight with my wife during my wedding ceremony. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2014 at 2:17pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, my friend announced that she'd lost weight recently. As I was congratulating her, my baby sister said, "I think you're still fat but that's good because you can give more meat to God when you go to heaven." Now I have to explain to a 6-year-old that God isn't a cannibal. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2014 at 7:37am / United Kingdom (Wolverhampton) / Kids

Today, I had to kick my own father out of my house after he started attacking my wife for breastfeeding our newborn son in the living room. All the way to the door, he ranted that "You don't see me whipping my dick out and pissing in front of everyone, do you?" FML

by Q / 05/20/2014 at 1:27pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, some girl in the street mistook me for Richard Simmons. FML

by romancocks / 05/09/2014 at 4:31pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked the girl I like if she had her eye on anyone, subtly hinting that I wanted to date her. I sat there while she confessed her love for her cousin. FML

by Wowthanks / 05/04/2014 at 8:13pm / United States (Colorado) / Love