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CJ290594

Offline (the 05/23/2014 at 10:02pm) | Search for a member

CJ290594

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 29 August 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 519
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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CJ290594's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of CJ290594's badges

CJ290594's favorite FMLs

Today, an American lady here in Ireland asked me if I was a Leprechaun. Thinking she was joking, and me being quite "vertically challenged," I decided to just say yes. She then grabbed me and made me endure photographs, cuddles and pats on the head from all her fellow tourists. FML

#21082683
187 comments

Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work what a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML

#20944786
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62158) - you deserved it (4052)

On 11/04/2013 at 12:45am - intimacy - by TheTruthofWomen (woman) - United States

Today, a telemarketer called me and asked if they could speak to my "mommy or daddy". I am 25 years old. FML

#19283246
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22152) - you deserved it (2390)

On 03/15/2012 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a telemarketer called me and asked if they could speak to my "mommy or daddy". I am 25 years old. FML

#19283246
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22152) - you deserved it (2390)

On 03/15/2012 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I broke my little toe. It got stuck in my panties as I struggled to get a leg through. FML

#19283083
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21567) - you deserved it (5694) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/15/2012 at 3:28pm - health - by Sica - France

Today, my dad insisted on having a family movie night. He chose the movies Jaws and Mayday. I'm going on a diving expedition tomorrow. FML

#19271191
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20890) - you deserved it (2451)

On 03/13/2012 at 1:59pm - misc - by Samantha - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got my yearbook. My sister and I are identical twins, and we realized only my sister had a picture in it. When we asked the head of yearbook, they said they thought it was the same girl trying to get two pictures, so they put in the prettier one. FML

#19269452
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37301) - you deserved it (2040)

On 03/13/2012 at 2:12am - misc - by Rynne S. - United States (Colorado)

Today, I called my wife from work to check in on her because she's eight months pregnant. She didn't answer. Instead she showed up at my work hysterically crying and screaming, "You don't love me because I'm a fat whale!" She then knocked everything off my desk. FML

#19255616
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30834) - you deserved it (2921)

On 03/11/2012 at 3:36am - love - by Tristan Brantley - United States (California)

Today, I was re-watching my wedding video. As I was walking down the aisle, you could hear my grandfather mutter "Here comes the bride, all fat and wide." FML

#19250410
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35828) - you deserved it (5277)

On 03/10/2012 at 9:20am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML

#19249399
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22929) - you deserved it (18522)

On 03/10/2012 at 1:50am - misc - by starboy - United States (California)

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

#19207930
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30094) - you deserved it (9449)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, after applying for a job at the local pet store, I picked up a ferret. It began licking my cheek, causing me to turn my head. It then latched onto my ear and hung like a giant furry hoop earring. I screamed, then quietly left the building. FML

#19091480
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19976) - you deserved it (4120)

On 02/16/2012 at 2:43am - animals - by parkertownparadise (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

#18983166
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42148) - you deserved it (9147)

On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I admitted my fear of small spaces to my boyfriend. His response was to immediately lock me in the hall closet. FML

#18918439
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25869) - you deserved it (4188)

On 01/26/2012 at 6:50pm - health - by Bailyboo (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was at Disneyland with a friend. We were watching the light show, and when Tinkerbell came out, we both started crying. Some guy noticed and called us "fucking pussies". FML

#18862954
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10180) - you deserved it (41267)

On 01/20/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by sharky (woman) - United States (California)



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