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Britney1124

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Britney1124

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Visits<b>MilkyFilmz</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 3:58pm

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Britney1124's favorite FMLs

Today, I got screamed at by a woman at work for feeding her 3-week-old infant formula instead of the bottled Kool-Aid that she packed. FML

#20854260
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45470) - you deserved it (2961)

On 08/25/2013 at 9:28pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was playing Charades with my boyfriend's family. When it was his turn, he pointed at me. His mother said "Bitch?". The answer was "relationship". FML

#20848780
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52548) - you deserved it (3825)

On 08/22/2013 at 12:40am - love - by Embarrassed (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got to watch how easy it is to break into my flat, after I locked myself out and went to my neighbour for help. He used a blunt pencil. FML

Today, my sister had an emotional breakdown because two guys love her and she can't pick just one. Meanwhile I'm single and spend my time laying treats on my floor in a pattern and watching my rabbit run in circles. FML

#20843729
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43991) - you deserved it (3782)

On 08/18/2013 at 9:36pm - misc - by Having a pretty sister sucks. - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

#20842823
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52025) - you deserved it (3112)

On 08/18/2013 at 5:37am - kids - by DrtySnchez - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went on a new medicine. One of the listed side-effects was "anal seepage" and I spent the better part of the day laughing with my coworkers about how it's "not a real side-effect". I found out that it really is while stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the way home. FML

#20839551
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38972) - you deserved it (9231)

On 08/15/2013 at 11:18pm - health - by stinky car - United States (Alabama)

Today, while discussing career prospects with my mom, she suggested that I become a penis puppeteer, because "Let's face it, you play with it 24/7. Why not make a career out of it?" Yeah, thanks. FML

#20838688
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35564) - you deserved it (11838)

On 08/15/2013 at 12:49pm - work - by kaynotentirelywrong (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I fell asleep on the beach while tanning. I was woken up by the flock of seagulls eating the bread from my stomach. Why was bread on my stomach? Because my little brother knows birds are my biggest fear. FML

#20837323
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43309) - you deserved it (5437)

On 08/14/2013 at 4:28pm - animals - by Nanana32 (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my 12-year-old son was shot in the foot. After hours of not talking, including to the police, he finally told us that his friend accidentally shot him with his dad's gun, and that he didn't want to say anything because he didn't want to "lose any street cred by snitching." FML

#20836449
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49750) - you deserved it (6107)

On 08/14/2013 at 12:26am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a call from my son's kindergarten teacher. Apparently my son asked a girl to marry him. After she said no, he stabbed her with a fork. FML

#20829995
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59114) - you deserved it (5413)

On 08/10/2013 at 12:02am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I actually had to explain to two of my friends that neither Alaska nor Nebraska are in Canada. I think I need new friends. FML

#20827400
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40928) - you deserved it (4855)

On 08/08/2013 at 2:52pm - misc - by ROBERT (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, in the middle of examining me, my gynecologist suddenly took a sharp intake of breath and vomited on the floor. FML

#20826932
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56153) - you deserved it (15826)

On 08/08/2013 at 7:10am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Latvia (Jelgavas)

Today, my friends thought it would be fun to change my dad's name on my phone to my girlfriend's name. Guess who got an erotic text message when standing next to me while in the line to buy groceries. FML

#20826589
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47429) - you deserved it (8737)

On 08/08/2013 at 12:43am - misc - by AnnoyedByFriends -

Today, I noticed that my new shampoo had an unfamiliar pink color to it. After some investigation, I found a dead mouse that had apparently cut itself on the bottle pump. I've been washing my hair with mouse blood. FML

#20825465
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56054) - you deserved it (4906)

On 08/07/2013 at 12:34pm - misc - by shampoomice (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home a little earlier than usual, only to walk in on my dad frantically trying to remove a ballgag from my mom's mouth. FML

#20822450
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50740) - you deserved it (4824)

On 08/05/2013 at 5:42pm - misc - by NO NO NO (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)



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