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Boy_Wonder27's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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Boy_Wonder27's favorite FMLs
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
by 504-A1 / 05/11/2012 at 6:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML
by Hakimstah / 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm / Lebanon / Intimacy
by lindsaykay / 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/12/2012 at 12:18am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
by Anonymous / 04/10/2012 at 4:57pm / United States (Michigan) / Love
by displeased / 04/05/2012 at 2:47am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when his sister knocked on the door and asked if she could borrow the zombie movie we were watching after we were done with it. We weren't watching a movie; I was just moaning. FML
by Anonymous / 04/04/2012 at 1:45pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy
by justgreat / 03/23/2012 at 10:30pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by noneedtostress / 03/17/2012 at 11:52am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
Today, I was feeling frisky for the first time in months, so I started feeling up my husband. He kept insisting he had a headache and that he wasn't feeling it tonight. When I noticed his sarcasm, he said "Yeah, doesn't feel so great, does it?" and turned the TV volume up. FML
by Anonymous / 02/24/2012 at 10:07pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/22/2012 at 12:42am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by nothowtheydoitinalabama / 02/21/2012 at 10:43pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by ShylaMarie / 02/14/2012 at 5:29pm / Canada / Kids