Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Bluemonster3

Offline (9 hours ago) | Search for a member

Bluemonster3

0Liked!

Bluemonster3Bluemonster3
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 28355
  • Number of comments : 106
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About Bluemonster3 : Welcome to my profile :)

Feel free to look around.

Bluemonster3's page activity

Visits<b>Flendre_scarlet</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 5:39am<b>Oddire</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 1:01am<b>footballguy55</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 2:01pm<b>Mindset</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 2:04am<b>WizardlyUnicorn</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 9:42pm<b>vividpictures</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 2:34pm<b>FootballGod911</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 11:08am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 6:32pm<b>icetube550</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 7:37pm<b>Afroninja4566</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 10:42pm<b>SmokinGuns</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 7:30pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 7:37am<b>Taira_Yuzuki</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:04pm<b>will45</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:02am<b>midpri1213</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 7:48pm<b>Kibaruto</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 11:06am<b>lord_meloetta</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 3:12am<b>1princess</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 7:16pm

Bluemonster3's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Bluemonster3's badges

Bluemonster3's favorite FMLs

Today, my hamster got loose from his cage. His name was Houdini. FML

#21249788
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22160) - you deserved it (5765)

On 09/01/2014 at 2:55pm - animals - by Houdini - United States (Texas)

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35869) - you deserved it (2918)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I was called in over speakers at the airport. The man who was speaking clearly and nearly burst out laughing when he said my name. Soon, a few people around also snickered when they heard it. I had to wait five minutes before I could casually stand up. My last name is Bastard. FML

#21248318
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35377) - you deserved it (2826)

On 08/30/2014 at 4:35am - misc - by poorbastard (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I almost got lucky with a girl from my course. We've been flirting since we met. After removing her top and moving downwards with my tongue, whilst moaning my name she decided to mention she has a boyfriend and that we needed to stop. FML

#21248283
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37607) - you deserved it (3938)

On 08/30/2014 at 2:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, it was my great aunt's funeral. We all had to wait two hours for the service to begin, because they forgot to dig the grave. FML

#21247920
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33218) - you deserved it (2050)

On 08/29/2014 at 2:54pm - misc - by abbshows (man) - United States

Today, my parents sat me down and told me that I'm adopted. I took it in stride, and reassured them that as far as I'm concerned, they're my true parents. That annoyed them. Apparently the whole thing was a prank for a YouTube video, which I ruined by not crying or freaking out. FML

#21247893
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39043) - you deserved it (2522)

On 08/29/2014 at 2:09pm - kids - by hannahka (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after moving into my new house, I woke up to strange sounds coming from the kitchen. I panicked and started sobbing, convinced it was either a robbery or a home invasion. Turned out it was just my cat. FML

#21247811
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24809) - you deserved it (9470)

On 08/29/2014 at 11:38am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my brother told my 3 year old son that cool kids call their parents by their real names. This wouldn't be half as bad if he hadn't also convinced my son that my real name was Satan. FML

#21247749
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35000) - you deserved it (3212)

On 08/29/2014 at 8:35am - kids - by Amithatevil - Japan (Kanagawa)

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

#21247589
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33875) - you deserved it (4655)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML

#21247445
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31852) - you deserved it (4273)

On 08/28/2014 at 9:47pm - love - by ch4nny (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went on a date with the world's biggest lightweight. She got blind drunk on wine before dessert, and slurred, "You look like... like a black... blueberry." Amused, I said, "You mean a blackberry?" She stared at me for several long seconds, confused, then passed out. Check please. FML

#21247229
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34397) - you deserved it (2609)

On 08/28/2014 at 3:58pm - love - by wowzer (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML

#21246884
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39297) - you deserved it (4686)

On 08/28/2014 at 12:34am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I won a goldfish at the amusement park. My little brother took him out of the bowl because he thought he was drowning. FML

#21246787
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34400) - you deserved it (2877)

On 08/27/2014 at 10:33pm - kids - by That idiot - United States (Nevada)

Today, after coming home from a two week vacation, my dog was pink, there were beer bottles and used condoms on my bed, and everything was a mess. I asked my sister, who'd been watching over the place, what had happened. She just said "Oops." and hung up. FML

#21246633
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34667) - you deserved it (3139)

On 08/27/2014 at 6:52pm - misc - by nayahbear24 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it's been a few months since my grandfather passed away. Now all of his porn subscriptions are getting forwarded to my address. FML

#21246620
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33612) - you deserved it (2712)

On 08/27/2014 at 6:03pm - misc - by dr.mantistobagon (woman) - United States (Vermont)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: