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I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35167) - you deserved it (11260)
On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)
Today, one of my elderly swimming students ran into me at Walmart. Being a polite teenager, I said hi to him. He looked at me surprised and said, "Oh dear! I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!" I'll never forget the look on his wife's face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31152) - you deserved it (1859)
Today, I stole a pen from the doctor's office while she wasn't looking. Later on at work, I idly pulled the pen out during a meeting. My colleague looked at me, horrified. The pen had the words "minimally invasive gynecological surgery" emblazoned on it. I'm a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4978) - you deserved it (32867)
On 02/21/2013 at 9:56pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my son asked me if the short films I write are for little kids or for adults. Since I write horror-filled films, I said it was for adults. He went and told his teacher that I made "adult films". FML
I agree, your life sucks (27548) - you deserved it (3118)
On 02/20/2013 at 7:01am - kids - by Laila - United States
Today, I was at a café with my friends when an elderly man noticed my dimples. He came up to me, stroked them while whispering, "One in a million" then walked out. Now my friends do this to me constantly, even while driving home. I almost hit a tree. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27334) - you deserved it (1905)
On 01/03/2013 at 6:35am - misc - by Dimples (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23323) - you deserved it (2376)
On 10/31/2012 at 1:01am - kids - by poorkids (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I went to the hospital in labor expecting a baby boy. I ended the day with identical twins, a baffled doctor, and a husband convinced that our sons can clone themselves. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18374) - you deserved it (1552)
On 10/29/2012 at 9:30pm - kids - by CutestBoysEver (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I found out that my girlfriend has secretly been conditioning me to get turned on by the smell of bananas. Guess whose new co-worker peels a nice, fragrant banana five times a day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20810) - you deserved it (2124)
On 10/29/2012 at 8:42pm - intimacy - by SadExperiment (man) - United States (California)
Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22266) - you deserved it (3161)
On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my girlfriend tried to wake me with a handjob. Because I'm a very light sleeper, I woke straight away and instinctively punched whoever was touching my dick. She forgave me, but I don't think her father ever will once he finds out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13789) - you deserved it (3193)
On 10/20/2012 at 1:29pm - love - by nahalDZ - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, I found out why my cat hasn't been coming home for regular meals. Apparently, my elderly next door neighbour has forgotten that her cat is dead and puts food out for it every morning. My cat is exploiting her by impersonating her dead cat to get better food. My cat is an asshole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20712) - you deserved it (3456)
On 10/10/2012 at 4:43am - animals - by assholecat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26511) - you deserved it (1821)
On 10/02/2012 at 3:39pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, I walked in to my apartment to see my husband sitting there with his toes painted pink. When I asked him why, he said, "I wanted to feel pretty." This is the man who is about to be the father of my child. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11902) - you deserved it (5363)
On 09/26/2012 at 10:14pm - love - by cmc9540 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend's transition into an annoying hipster is complete. It started with the not-really-necessary nerd glasses and the Mötley Crüe t-shirt, the final straw being the affected British accent. I'm considering where to dump the body. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17525) - you deserved it (1833)
On 09/24/2012 at 1:07am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (17383) - you deserved it (1307)
On 08/26/2012 at 5:21am - misc - by ewww (woman) - United States (Washington)
Monday 20 May 2013
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