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Bleepityblah

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Bleepityblah

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 230
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML

#21067130
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49003) - you deserved it (3948)

On 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm - misc - by BakedBat (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, the boy who sits next to me in class accidentally dropped his sketch pad. It turns out he's really talented at drawing portraits. They're so good that I could recognize myself in all of them. FML

#21058436
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45077) - you deserved it (7026)

On 02/12/2014 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a woman pushed a stroller in front of my car. Thinking I'd hit someone, I jumped out. Turns out it was a doll. The "woman" was a 14-year-old girl, claiming, "I did it for the Vine!" FML

#21058421
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49908) - you deserved it (3934)

On 02/12/2014 at 7:52pm - misc - by Parusu - United States (Florida)

Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML

#21001182
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48236) - you deserved it (4779)

On 12/22/2013 at 10:36am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via a sign he made in front of my Minecraft house. FML

#21000308
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44116) - you deserved it (5832)

On 12/21/2013 at 3:05pm - misc - by back to creepers (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML

#20967834
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59462) - you deserved it (4297)

On 11/23/2013 at 11:11am - misc - by I hate that game - United Kingdom (Wigan)

Today, my father took revenge on me for bankrupting him in a game of Monopoly. His revenge consisted of having a truckload of sand dumped in my driveway while I was at work. FML

#20966996
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38126) - you deserved it (3203)

On 11/22/2013 at 3:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend went down on me. I don't know why, but my mind wandered. He now thinks that he has the skills of a porn star, while I'm pretty sure that finally solving a mathematical problem I've been working on for a week caused me to orgasm. FML

#20963297
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48106) - you deserved it (8026)

On 11/19/2013 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by you+me-clothes=53>< (woman) - Austria (Wien)

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

#20908389
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46389) - you deserved it (3797)

On 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm - misc - by british_babe (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I purposely set my phone off in class to make it seem like I had friends. FML

#20903065
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39752) - you deserved it (15375)

On 10/01/2013 at 6:18am - misc - by :/ -

Today, my dad made a big show of sending me to my room and grounding me for a week. Not because he heard me cursing at my video game, but because I "swear like a little girl" and it embarrassed him in front of his friends. FML

#20889957
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35480) - you deserved it (6691)

On 09/21/2013 at 9:10am - misc - by dadyoureacunt (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my neighbor's daughter started learning how to play the trombone. FML

#20857611
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41158) - you deserved it (4854)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:33am - kids - by Alice (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got my girlfriend to play Smash Bros Brawl with me. As it was her first time, I set up handicaps to give her at least a shot at winning. She won, quite handily. A little irritated at this, I took off the handicaps and tried again. She beat me even faster. FML

#20847705
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38993) - you deserved it (23222)

On 08/21/2013 at 11:17am - misc - by Loser (man) - United States

Today, I was showing a new girl around at school. As we were walking through the parking lot she noticed a green jeep and commented "I heard the person who drives that is a total creep. Is he?" I said I didn't know who it was. It was my car. FML

#20846340
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49642) - you deserved it (5692)

On 08/20/2013 at 1:40pm - misc - by mycar - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I discovered that my wife named our kids after her former lovers. We have two sons and a daughter. FML

#20819538
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48563) - you deserved it (4854)

On 08/03/2013 at 11:29pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)



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