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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 June 1985 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2024
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Blazar420 : Some say I'm an asshole, some say I'm a dick. Others think I'm a really nice person. If you can take sarcasm, you'll likely be one of the latter. Always open to meeting new people as long as they're not a moron, so if you're confident you're not a moron feel free to message me.

I like classic rock, punk rock (mostly hardcore and Oi, no fucking emo please), 90's alternative, and some old heavy metal.

I am recently (and happily) divorced and have two kids who are awesome (and always will be).

Blazar420's page activity

Visits<b>hunteryager</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 10:37pm<b>marcie19</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 4:35am<b>MigraineurOfLife</b> - the 04/16/2012 at 10:34pm<b>Cinn</b> - the 01/22/2012 at 1:33pm<b>caranina</b> - the 11/23/2011 at 7:48pm<b>Alexisthebestest</b> - the 11/23/2011 at 12:32pm<b>fthislyfe</b> - the 09/29/2011 at 10:49am

Blazar420's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.


You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of Blazar420's badges

Blazar420's favorite FMLs

Today, while at work in the service department of a car dealership, I sat in the driver seat of an old man's car to get the mileage. He'd just pissed in the seat. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2011 at 12:30pm / United States (South Carolina) / Transportation

Today, my mother lectured me about going to the bar too often. She did this while rolling a joint. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2011 at 10:04am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML

by Sabraynay / 09/28/2011 at 2:47am / Intimacy

Today, after months of telling my parents I was going to live on my own, I finally moved out. Not even 24 hours being out of their house, some reject burned down the apartment complex I live in. Guess who's moving back home. FML

by Foreverathome / 09/28/2011 at 1:17am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML

by confused / 09/28/2011 at 12:55am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, my grandparents came to visit. So far, they have called me fat, bragged about how my cousin is better than me, and told me how I'm not good enough for them. It's okay, though, they gave me a pretzel from the airline and a textbook on physics. In another language. FML

by FlyingWhisps / 09/27/2011 at 7:33pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, a man punched me for sleeping with his wife. Bewildered, I insisted I would never sleep with a married woman, to which he retorted "She wasn't my wife when it HAPPENED, dumbass!" I was assaulted for sleeping with my own girlfriend three years ago. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2011 at 3:53pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, my boyfriend bought me a gorgeous ring that I fell in love with. As he slid the ring on my finger for the first time, he started moving it up and down my finger and making loud sex sounds, completely ruining the romantic moment. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2011 at 1:30pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend still couldn't work out where my clitoris is. It's RIGHT THERE, you idiot. I've pointed it out, but each time it's like he needs a compass and a map or something. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2011 at 11:56am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, my mom called me a bastard, told me I should run away, and said I don't deserve to live in her house. All because I didn't use a plate when I ate a Poptart. FML

by sadkid / 09/25/2011 at 7:23pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to get my friend a drink while she sat in the lounge watching TV with my dog. When I came back, I found her licking my dogs ears. She said he dared her to do it. FML

by CheeseMonsters / 01/24/2010 at 7:28am / United Kingdom (Reading) / Animals

Today, I was at a party where I ate a bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

by swedishdude / 11/14/2009 at 8:37am / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Miscellaneous