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About Blazar420 : Some say I'm an asshole, some say I'm a dick. Others think I'm a really nice person. If you can take sarcasm, you'll likely be one of the latter. Always open to meeting new people as long as they're not a moron, so if you're confident you're not a moron feel free to message me.
I like classic rock, punk rock (mostly hardcore and Oi, no fucking emo please), 90's alternative, and some old heavy metal.
I am recently (and happily) divorced and have two kids who are awesome (and always will be).
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, my boyfriend changed his relationship status on Facebook to "Single" and his status to "I'm not kidding, leave your key on the counter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11415) - you deserved it (1152)
On 01/10/2012 at 12:52am - love - by Janie (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Afterwards, he said he was in love with me and that he wants to be with me forever. It was also at this time I realised that I can't stand him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3502) - you deserved it (7942)
On 01/09/2012 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia
Today, after months of dating, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to take things to the next level. He told me that he couldn't have sex with me because of his religious beliefs. I would've been fine with this if it weren't for the fact that I know he and his family are all atheists. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9348) - you deserved it (1178)
On 01/04/2012 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by Anon - United States (California)
Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12832) - you deserved it (1313)
On 12/09/2011 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Aly (woman) - United States
Today, I played Taboo with my boyfriend and my conservative family. It was my boyfriend's turn and his word was "cherry". His only clue to me was, "I popped your..." He was the only one who found it funny. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26644) - you deserved it (3333)
On 12/04/2011 at 12:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27916) - you deserved it (6491)
On 11/27/2011 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9870) - you deserved it (4658)
On 11/26/2011 at 10:09am - intimacy - by hitintheeye - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10485) - you deserved it (6018)
On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy - United States
Today, I saw my upstairs neighbor outside getting the mail. She asked how my day was, and then apologized that the sound of her baby's crying through the walls kept me up last night. Apparently she heard me when I yelled at 2am for her fucking demon spawn to shut up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4376) - you deserved it (10349)
On 10/27/2011 at 2:41am - misc - by Deborah - United States
Today, it was our 5th anniversary, so I decided to play a little joke on my girlfriend. Before I gave her the real present, an engagement ring, I gave her a gift-wrapped rolling pin instead. I ended up in the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8713) - you deserved it (5405)
On 10/20/2011 at 4:26am - love - by Awie (man) - Austria (Wien)
Today, my fiancé has been jumping out of closets and from around corners with a video camera, trying to catch me naked. He says he wants to post a video online so his old high school friends can "rate" me. I'm now afraid to get intimate, shower, or even change my clothes in my own home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13491) - you deserved it (1423)
On 10/19/2011 at 2:19pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I found out my boss and some employees on my floor have bets placed on who can get the best picture of my ass. I found out when one of the pictures was accidentally sent to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9543) - you deserved it (1087)
On 10/19/2011 at 12:49pm - work - by ikickgingers - United States
Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40680) - you deserved it (11114)
On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my twin boys who are 5 decided to teach each other how to fly off the shed out back. They are still in their pajamas. Batman's arm is broken and Spiderman has a slight concussion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10074) - you deserved it (1952)
On 10/19/2011 at 10:03am - kids - by optimistic2628 - United States
Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40597) - you deserved it (5771)
On 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm - intimacy - by Mini-wanker (man) - United States (New York)
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