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Bellaness's favorite FMLs
by whatnot / 08/04/2011 at 12:04am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML
by toni405 / 07/21/2011 at 5:24pm / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy
Today, I found out that my boyfriend is extremely jealous of a stuffed toy that sits on my bed, all because it gets to 'sleep in the same bed as me and he doesn't.' Now, whenever he comes over, he throws it at the wall, death glares at it, then gets up and kicks it under my bed. FML
by holdengurl18 / 06/21/2011 at 12:46am / China / Love
by crushed dreams / 06/16/2011 at 2:20am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I missed my flight because I was held in airport security because I'd "threatened" an employee. He had confiscated my eyelash curler and jokingly I asked if he thought I was going to curl him to death. He didn't laugh. FML
by missy / 06/15/2011 at 10:42pm / United States (Alaska) / Transportation
by Evaki1 / 06/13/2011 at 10:24am / Greece (Attiki) / Kids
Today, I discovered a tick on my penis. After a long battle, he finally let go. Four hours later I'm in the hospital. My penis is twice the normal size. I may have won the battle but lost the war. FML
by John jacob / 06/13/2011 at 2:25am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
by ash / 06/12/2011 at 11:20pm / United States (Missouri) / Love
by julia / 06/11/2011 at 7:12am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
by KillMeNow / 06/06/2011 at 2:27am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by no one / 05/21/2011 at 5:07am / United States (Alaska) / Intimacy
by wolfie898 / 05/21/2011 at 3:28am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by btswc / 05/21/2011 at 3:18am / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy
Today, I had my new girlfriend over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, my dad started poking her with his fork. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he barked back, "Just making sure she isn't a blow-up doll!" FML
by Anonymous / 05/20/2011 at 7:30pm / United States (California) / Love
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, it's been two years since I graduated with my master's. It's also been the same amount of…