About Beckleyy : I'm Alicia(:
Favorite color is red❤
I love to read
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Today, I woke up to a hand rubbing my very erect penis, and a woman's peppermint breath in my ear. "Mom?" I called out instinctively, recalling how she always smells like peppermint. The hand stopped rubbing, and I turned to face my very disgusted looking girlfriend of three years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24359) - you deserved it (67761)
On 05/17/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by Ohshit (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was working at a grocery store when a couple of my co-workers called a code pink in aisle 22, which means there was an attractive woman in that aisle. After hearing about how hot she was, I went over to see her for myself. It was my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52296) - you deserved it (4040)
On 05/17/2009 at 1:46am - work - by sonofmilf (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, a little girl came up to me and said "Hi, my name is Lindsey, lets be friends!". I thought she was cute so I played along and said "Okay! My name is Jen!" Her Reply: "Wait, nevermind, I don't want to be friends anymore. You smell funny." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40525) - you deserved it (1575)
On 05/17/2009 at 12:33am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my five year old daughter came up to me and asked, "Mom, why are we so poor?" I replied, in a sweet motherly tone "Honey, we're not poor." She then asked, "Then why do you dress like we are poor?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (38689) - you deserved it (6731)
On 05/16/2009 at 10:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41457) - you deserved it (2598)
On 05/16/2009 at 5:41pm - love - by Heifer (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I called the guy I've liked for a long time and told him how I felt. He didn't say anything except for "hello." After I spilled my feelings, I hear "Haha, just kidding I'm not here right now! Call me back later!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (41822) - you deserved it (7353)
On 05/16/2009 at 5:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I got home from college. Since I haven't seen my parents in almost a year I sorta expected them to come meet me/pick me up at the airport. Nope. What did I get instead? A text from my dad saying, "I hope you have a key." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35949) - you deserved it (2566)
On 05/16/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)
Today, my father sent me a letter in the mail. He spelled my first name wrong on the front of the envelope. I'm turning 28 years old and my own father doesn't know that my name has two "t"s in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36816) - you deserved it (2203)
On 05/16/2009 at 1:49pm - misc - by bclark (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I found out that my writing teacher entered in one of my paper grades wrong. After many emails, she said she can't change my grade unless I fax her the original. I need that grade fixed so I can keep my scholarship. I can’t find the paper anywhere. That one paper could cost me $30,000. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61234) - you deserved it (7127)
On 05/16/2009 at 10:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was shopping at a supermarket. As I was about to pay for my items, I noticed the cashier was very cute. Trying to be nice, I smiled. She smiled back and said "Hello, how are you?" Instead of saying 'I'm good' or "I'm okay", I said "I'm gay". FML
I agree, your life sucks (53229) - you deserved it (21689)
On 05/16/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by UncleRory (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was at the mall with my girlfriend's family. Her 7 year old brother told me he was feeling sad, so I tried to give him a pat on the back, but it turns out he had a bruise there. He yelled out "don't touch me there!" In the middle of the mall. Now her parents think I'm a pedophile. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40834) - you deserved it (3146)
On 05/16/2009 at 4:39am - misc - by notacreep (man) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, my boyfriend and I went to a Taylor Swift concert. At the concert they put up a sign that said "Scream if you love country boys." My boyfriend took one look at it and started screaming. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45975) - you deserved it (8250)
On 05/16/2009 at 3:52am - love - by TayTay (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I went out on a first date with a cute guy. Turns out we won't be going on a date again because I didn't know the difference between "Star Wars" and "Star Trek." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24686) - you deserved it (48846)
On 05/15/2009 at 5:17pm - love - by not4geeks (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my girlfriend was sick so I took her 5 year old daughter out to eat. Half-way through our "date" she asks me loudly "Can we go back to the car now and take our clothes off?" Apparently she meant her toy dog's clothes. Face burning, we left a half laughing/half glaring crowd behind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36898) - you deserved it (2322)
On 05/15/2009 at 1:10pm - kids - by BigBadTron (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that I could never marry him because he's a Yankees fan. He told me he could never marry me because he couldn't see himself having a terrible love life for the rest of his life. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34734) - you deserved it (9118)
On 05/15/2009 at 11:18am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Monday 17 June 2013
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