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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Batsumoto

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Batsumoto
  • Town/Country : Alkmaar, Netherlands
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 12 June 1988 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 950
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Batsumoto's favorite FMLs

Today, I flew a toy helicopter into my face. FML

#7436453 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (5121) - you deserved it (20500)

On 01/19/2010 at 12:42pm - misc - by magicalDEATH (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I was vacuuming our house because I wanted to help my parents. I wore a headset while listening to REALLY loud music. The vacuuming job took me two hours and when I took of my headset I noticed that I hadn't started the vacuum cleaner. FML

#7415658 (208)

I agree, your life sucks (6252) - you deserved it (41135)

On 01/18/2010 at 6:01am - misc - by Adrian16 (man) - Norway (Vestfold)

Today, I got a new cat. I tried to reenact the opening scene from Lion King, where in Simba gets held up for everyone to see. The fan was on when I lifted my cat up. FML

I agree, your life sucks (8391) - you deserved it (48258)

On 10/25/2009 at 1:18pm - animals - by stixx (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my cat managed to lock my dad and me outside of our house. FML

#5937584 (136)

I agree, your life sucks (22292) - you deserved it (4661)

On 10/21/2009 at 10:58pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw my son. I didn't know I had a son. FML

#5919547 (136)

I agree, your life sucks (29584) - you deserved it (16307)

On 10/20/2009 at 8:44pm - kids - by Raiders4ever (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I told a lady that came into my clothing store that I thought her abstract looking necklace was pretty. She responded, "Oh... Thats actually a pipe that goes into my lung." FML

I agree, your life sucks (22198) - you deserved it (5775)

On 10/17/2009 at 4:45am - misc - by oopsjsp90 (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while meeting guys from my dad's work, they told him what a pretty daughter he had, to which he responded "Nah, it's just shit-loads of makeup." FML

#5857727 (116)

I agree, your life sucks (25202) - you deserved it (4642)

On 10/16/2009 at 10:04pm - misc - by SheWentCrayola (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I told my daughter how her eyes look exactly as pretty as my wife's. She told me that she loved the way my eyeballs stick out of my face, just like Elmo. FML

I agree, your life sucks (28173) - you deserved it (2964)

On 10/03/2009 at 8:33am - kids - by dessaye (man) - Singapore

Today, I told my husband I wanted a divorce. He told me he didn't. End of discussion. FML

#5525273 (201)

I agree, your life sucks (32394) - you deserved it (11859)

On 09/28/2009 at 11:14am - misc - by jentown11 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was eating M&Ms on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

#5187635 (136)

I agree, your life sucks (45754) - you deserved it (10322)

On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend came in my room dressed as Harry Potter and declared that he was going to put his basilisk into my chamber of secrets. And yes, that was my first time. FML

#5168083 (214)

I agree, your life sucks (24208) - you deserved it (5213)

On 09/10/2009 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by ginny (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was arguing with my dad. I called him a geriatric fool. He replied with, "Well at least I know who my biological father is." I have no idea if he's joking. FML

#5107055 (144)

I agree, your life sucks (40888) - you deserved it (5328)

On 09/07/2009 at 3:19pm - kids - by Waheyyy (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I met some of my boyfriend's family for the first time. His aunt said I was really cute, which made me happy. As we were leaving I said "Your aunt thought I was cute." His reply..."Yeah, well, my aunt's on drugs". FML

I agree, your life sucks (34971) - you deserved it (2707)

On 09/06/2009 at 5:33pm - love - by me (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, when we change positions, he shouts: "Power Rangers - Transform!" FML

#4636801 (286)

I agree, your life sucks (48198) - you deserved it (8639)

On 08/18/2009 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was at the laundromat doing my clothes when I noticed a cute guy next to me. I tried to be a ninja and sneak my sock into his basket so I could start a conversation with him. He saw me. FML

#4632889 (257)

I agree, your life sucks (6312) - you deserved it (47842)

On 08/18/2009 at 4:52pm - misc - by Laundrylady (woman) - United States (Georgia)