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Bathory

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Bathory
  • Town/Country : United States of America
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 21 September 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 8875
  • Number of comments : 115
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Bathory's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Bathory's favorite FMLs

Today, while changing my tampon in the stall of my high school's bathroom, I lost control of the plastic applicator. The blood-covered apparatus shot out like a rocket underneath the stall door. For a moment I thought no one noticed, then the screaming began. FML

#99894
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46290) - you deserved it (4881)

On 02/21/2009 at 10:16pm - misc - by isuckatlife (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got my fake ID and went out with the boys to dinner and the bars. One of my friends asked to see my ID. He noticed my birthday didn't make me over 21. I paid $170 for a fake ID with my real birthday. FML

#98972
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10922) - you deserved it (65850)

On 02/21/2009 at 8:19pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, and she asked me if I ever get made fun of in the locker room for my small penis. FML

#97729
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82260) - you deserved it (5508)

On 02/21/2009 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by Mike (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got an email from my professor with my grade for a paper. It said, "Solid writing, but you should have proofread your final draft more carefully." In a moment of annoyance, I typed in the reply box, "God should have proofread your FACE more carefully." My elbow hit the send button. FML

#97434
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13587) - you deserved it (57967)

On 02/21/2009 at 4:43pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to get my blood drawn for the first time. After I explained to the nurse how nervous I was, she replied, "Oh honey, don't worry! This is my first time too!" FML

#91995
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43557) - you deserved it (2209)

On 02/20/2009 at 9:37pm - health - by trackgurl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I walked out of the bathroom when two guys were checking me out and said "nice tail" I smiled and strutted to my next class. When I was about to sit down in my desk, the girl behind me said "did you know you have toilet paper hanging out of your pants?" FML

#79347
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14600) - you deserved it (30137)

On 02/19/2009 at 4:11pm - misc - by Christen (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my grandmother called. She greeted me by my mother's name. When I told her it was not my mother, she apologized and corrected herself, but this time she addressed me as my sister. When I told her it was not my sister either, she said "Sorry, wrong number" and hung up. FML

#65383
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40512) - you deserved it (2095)

On 02/18/2009 at 12:08am - misc - by fuckthat (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my brother joked that our dog was more attractive than I was. I looked to my mom for support, and she said "Well, she is pure bred." FML

#63875
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30317) - you deserved it (2488)

On 02/17/2009 at 9:52pm - animals - by Noname (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, in front of the entire family, I yelled at my mom and told her she wasn't a good parent. She responded with "Well, at least I had friends when I was your age." FML

#62325
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14483) - you deserved it (38525)

On 02/17/2009 at 6:33pm - misc - by loser (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I spent $20 on a spray tan, $30 to have my make up done, and $50 on a pretty new dress all for a special date with my boyfriend. It turns out I spent $100 just to get dumped. FML

#60483
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36685) - you deserved it (6381)

On 02/17/2009 at 12:05pm - misc - by bertthelamb (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
496 comments

I agree, your life sucks (213676) - you deserved it (73280)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I looked on my sister's phone. There was a text from her boyfriend: "Let's go camping again, I bought more condoms so we won't make a big mess this time." Last time they went camping, they borrowed my sleeping bag. FML

#43502
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63927) - you deserved it (6619)

On 02/14/2009 at 7:38pm - misc - by NeverCampingAgain (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my two best friends decided to boycott Valentine's Day, ditching their boyfriends to hang out together. Not only am I single, but I wasn't invited. FML

#43145
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33295) - you deserved it (2044)

On 02/14/2009 at 6:14pm - misc - by Noname - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, he grabbed my double chin and goes "gobble, gobble". FML

#36168
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32395) - you deserved it (16752)

On 02/13/2009 at 9:37am - misc - by fmlfmboyfriendah (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home calling bingo numbers. One woman stood up and started making noises, so I assumed she had won and started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML

#32415
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77130) - you deserved it (9993)

On 02/12/2009 at 5:21pm - misc - by janedoe (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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