Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Bathory

Search for a member

Bathory

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 21 September 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10971
  • Number of comments : 115
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Bathory's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 8:38pm<b>Kitty_Kat16</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 11:34am<b>lifelikedat</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 1:18am<b>VHNox</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 10:51pm<b>yuriel</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 2:59pm<b>DaDezza244</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 9:53am<b>jawidm</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 11:45pm<b>Zrtuy1</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 2:15pm<b>Boys_Cars</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 3:51am<b>rubez08</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 10:11pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 3:42am<b>revan546</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 8:12pm<b>hahatofunny</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 11:28pm<b>OperationAxis</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 12:45am<b>rawrimaeatchu</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 12:38pm<b>MyUsernameKatie</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 4:10am<b>sneakattacked</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 2:12am<b>EllaJSwiftie</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 1:50pm

Bathory's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Bathory's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were at his house having sex. After about 30 minutes, his mom came home and was knocking on the door asking "What are you doing?" Thinking I might have a chance to sneak out, I got dressed real quiet. Then my boyfriend answers, "Zoe. I'm doing Zoe." FML

#459925
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82252) - you deserved it (15041)

On 03/19/2009 at 2:05am - intimacy - by Zoe123 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to my friend's house. While she went to the kitchen, I noticed a little pink pastry on her desk. It looked really good, so I decided to take a bite before she got back. As I bit into it, a sizzling noise started, and foam overflowed in my mouth. It was a bath bomb. FML

#458793
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10209) - you deserved it (91264)

On 03/19/2009 at 1:09am - misc - by skywayavenue (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got a phone call saying I was no longer a bridesmaid for a wedding in June. It's my mom's 4th wedding. I'm getting replaced by our dog. FML

#400930
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (201063) - you deserved it (16846)

On 03/16/2009 at 10:41pm - animals - by Noname - United States (California)

Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML

#357552
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (213384) - you deserved it (35203)

On 03/15/2009 at 9:14pm - money - by twit (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went to Walmart with my mom. At the check out line I was eating a bag of chips as my mom bought her stuff. I inhaled while eating and I started to choke. The cashier asked me if I was okay. My mom just waved her hand, and said, "Sometimes she does that for attention, ignore her." FML

#314524
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86835) - you deserved it (7448)

On 03/14/2009 at 12:13am - health - by choker (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boss had to leave the house for a little while. She asked me to take any messages she got. I answered the phone and lady calling said she was returning her call about the opening for a nanny position. I am the current nanny. I found out I am being fired by the new nanny. FML

#260978
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56944) - you deserved it (2627)

On 03/10/2009 at 2:52pm - work - by nannynomore (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I stretched out my wedding dress on my bed so it could air out before the big day tomorrow. Later I returned to my room only to find my cat on my wedding dress, it peed on it. FML

#260115
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59030) - you deserved it (18406)

On 03/10/2009 at 11:53am - animals - by Noname (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, the kids I teach informed me that I had spelled my name incorrectly on the board. I looked at it and assured them that I had spelled it correctly. I'm 22 and a graduate student, they're six and mentally challenged. Guess who was right? FML

#260093
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16542) - you deserved it (63154)

On 03/10/2009 at 11:46am - work - by Noname (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I emailed the guy I like to ask him on a coffee date. He responded, declining by telling me he never drinks coffee. We met at Starbucks. FML

#257838
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56236) - you deserved it (3610)

On 03/10/2009 at 12:20am - love - by nononame (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I went to the ER for severe pain in my abdominal area. The doctor comes in after looking at the CT scan and says, "Well it's not your appendix." Thinking I'm in the clear I say, "That's Awesome", the doctor then responded with "It's probably your testicles." FML

Today, it was my birthday. I set up a dinner party for 20 of my closest friends. I arrived at the restaurant, fully dressed and everything. When I got there, I thought everyone was ready to surprise me, but instead, nobody showed up. FML

#214993
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (94508) - you deserved it (6190)

On 03/05/2009 at 2:24am - misc - by STUPID BIRTHDAY (man) - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend to a very nice restaurant. I thought it would be a good place to pop the question. I gave the ring to the waiter and asked him to put it on her dessert plate. When she saw it she picked it up, put it down and said "no". Then she started to eat the dessert. FML

#211586
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82016) - you deserved it (4892)

On 03/04/2009 at 9:18pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to get my eyebrows waxed at a korean salon. I have never been there before and it's hard to understand their accents. The women asked me if I wanted "them all off". Not fully understanding what she said, I agreed. When she showed me the mirror, she had taken off my whole eyebrow. FML

#197849
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18851) - you deserved it (46744)

On 03/03/2009 at 5:47pm - misc - by brows (woman) - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: