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About Baia_girl77 : Um idk
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Today, while watching TV with my wife, I realized that we were still watching "My Little Pony" even though the kids had been asleep for half an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14252) - you deserved it (3306)
On 04/19/2012 at 12:08pm - misc - by ajnmegs - United States (Colorado)
Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28525) - you deserved it (1649)
On 02/02/2012 at 6:32am - misc - by aliezzedine (man) - Lebanon
Today, I had to sit through 10 minutes of hearing a man on the tram tell his friend in explicit detail about all the filthy sex acts he'd like to do to me. His friend told him to take a photo to jack off to later. When I tried to tell the tram driver, he told me to "take it as a compliment." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23607) - you deserved it (2311)
On 01/19/2012 at 3:32am - intimacy - by missprude666 (woman) - Australia
Today, my boyfriend referred to his penis as 'The Eye of Sauron'. It didn't help when he pulled down his foreskin, pointed it in my direction and said 'I see you'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22794) - you deserved it (3398)
On 01/18/2012 at 1:29pm - intimacy - by anon - United Kingdom
Today, I was sexing it up with my boyfriend. Halfway through, he looked at me and said, "Y'know what you never see in a porno? Intellectual conversation. Read any good books lately?" He wouldn't keep going until I answered. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17941) - you deserved it (4240)
On 01/10/2012 at 4:36am - intimacy - by eakthegeek - United States
Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11617) - you deserved it (1411) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I discovered that for the last six months my mother has been leaving my TV on FOX while I sleep, in the hope that my subconscious will absorb it and turn me into "a morally-upright human being". FML
I agree, your life sucks (20232) - you deserved it (3110)
On 12/16/2011 at 5:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I saw a quarter in my poop. My friends say I do stupid things when I get drunk. Apparently, eating change is one of them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6222) - you deserved it (21636)
On 12/13/2011 at 1:32am - health - by photomark - United States
Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12832) - you deserved it (1313)
On 12/09/2011 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Aly (woman) - United States
Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML
I agree, your life sucks (5433) - you deserved it (48558)
On 12/08/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by lebato97 - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I discovered that the word 'randy' means 'horny' in England. I'm going to England next semester to study abroad. My name is Randy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32217) - you deserved it (3220)
On 12/06/2011 at 10:36am - intimacy - by ThisIsGonnaBeAwkward (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend refered to her vagina as a meat wallet, and to my penis as small change. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22166) - you deserved it (3468)
On 12/03/2011 at 5:04am - intimacy - by trembelwick - Canada (Ontario)
Today, a private number called me telling me to "Beware the water bottles" as soon as a water bottle flew through my open window, hitting me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8145) - you deserved it (1011)
On 12/02/2011 at 12:23am - misc - by waterbottlehit (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try something new. I ended up tied to the bed, and my girlfriend discovered how ticklish I am. Worst 3 hours of my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25985) - you deserved it (5841)
On 11/30/2011 at 1:43am - intimacy - by me - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, I'm spending time with my granny, with whom I'm supposed to live with for a few weeks. I've noticed that she repeats the last word of every sentence I say, and now I'm wondering how it's possible for me to now be so horrible that I want to punch a sweet 92-year-old lady in the head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7360) - you deserved it (1478)
On 11/29/2011 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)
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