BadSwimmerGirl

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BadSwimmerGirl

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 4 October 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 467
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About BadSwimmerGirl : frick

BadSwimmerGirl's page activity

Visits<b>regenerate</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 2:48pm<b>Black_Knight80</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 5:03am

BadSwimmerGirl's FML badges

Judgmental

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Mobility

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Up and coming moderator

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BadSwimmerGirl's favorite FMLs

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

by ayye_its_nikki / 12/19/2012 at 12:07am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally knocked over a mall Santa on his way to meet some children. I've never had that many hate-filled eyes on me at once. FML

by Anonymous / 12/18/2012 at 12:15am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a date with a great girl; we went out to dinner and saw a movie. After the movie, we went out to my car to find out that a homeless man had broken the window, climbed into it, and was eating the leftover pasta with his fingers. FML

by Alec / 12/10/2012 at 2:01am / United States / Transportation

Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML

by hailey / 12/10/2012 at 12:10am / United States (Maryland) / Money

Today, a woman came up to me at work and screamed at me for "taking forever" to come and wait at her table. I work at Wendy's. FML

by FastFoodWaiter / 09/03/2012 at 7:43pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Work

Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML

by Anonymous / 07/27/2012 at 12:46am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my mom got a new puppy and named her Olivia. Which would be fine, if that wasn't the name I had been planning to give my baby, who's due in 3 weeks. Thanks mom. FML

by madmomma / 07/25/2012 at 3:46pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, my sister and I had a huge fight because I flushed the toilet while she was taking a bath. The faucet for the bath was not running, but she insisted that she felt the water in the tub turn "scalding hot." She won't listen when I try to explain to her that it doesn't work like that. FML

by Raaaaage / 07/22/2012 at 2:54am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had eight teeth removed in preparation for getting my braces fitted. My winter break will now consists of barely being able to sleep or eat, tasting blood, and looking like a goofy-ass chipmunk. FML

by Julie is in pain / 07/06/2012 at 1:11pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went for a jog. I was 5 km away from home when I had a sudden urge to poop. I didn't want to use the bushes, so I thought I could hold it in. I was wrong. FML

by Anonymous / 07/04/2012 at 9:48am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I walked in on my new puppy peeing on the carpet. The trainer had told me to punish her when she's bad by shaking a metal can of pennies at her, since the noise scares dogs. I shook it at her, and she responded by having explosive diarrhea all over the carpet in fright. FML

by doggone / 05/05/2012 at 7:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, my apartment was robbed by my landlord. Her logic? "I own the building, and therefore everything in it." That TV cost more than my rent. FML

Today, I accidentally adopted a dolphin for $125. FML

by Optimus_Prime97 / 05/02/2012 at 10:39pm / United States / Money

Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML

by lindsaykay / 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my best friend stopped by my house, borrowed a movie, and left. That was the extent of our communication for the day. Today is my birthday. FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2012 at 12:27am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous