Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Ayada

Search for a member

Ayada

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1231
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Ayada : Hi there.

Ayada's page activity

Visits<b>44LynnLynn</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 10:11pm<b>swagisforchumps</b> - the 03/14/2013 at 4:50pm<b>incendiaaa</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 4:28pm<b>noxiffic</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 5:33pm<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 01/31/2013 at 6:36pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/26/2013 at 5:32am<b>Angelichoney</b> - the 01/20/2013 at 2:24pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 9:38pm<b>MitunaCaptor</b> - the 01/11/2013 at 6:40am<b>ltaviuni</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 2:27pm<b>da_directioner39</b> - the 01/01/2013 at 10:04pm

Ayada's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Ayada's badges

Ayada's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog died. We planned to get her cremated and keep the ashes. My sister put forward the idea of putting the ashes in our food so our dog can be "inside of us, always." She's completely serious. I'm scared to eat food from her now. FML

#20438971
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32937) - you deserved it (2089)

On 01/02/2013 at 4:53pm - animals - by Anon. -

Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML

#20436185
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36521) - you deserved it (6250)

On 01/01/2013 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by lonely dreams - United States (Nevada)

Today, I can hear my flatmate masturbating loudly and asking himself if he likes it. And replying. FML

#20436012
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52484) - you deserved it (3971)

On 01/01/2013 at 10:20am - intimacy - by ashbeat - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at church, when my mom's phone went off during the sermon. As if that wasn't humiliating enough for me, her ring tone was set to the Bed Intruder song. FML

#20430388
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25779) - you deserved it (3538)

On 12/29/2012 at 5:33pm - misc - by killme (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, my 6-year-old nephew opened his Christmas gift. The first words out of his mouth were, "This is cheap." FML

#20427233
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31544) - you deserved it (6348)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:03am - kids - by UngratefulBrat - United States (New York)

Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML

#20427124
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38709) - you deserved it (7966)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States

Today, I walked in on my sister plucking her nipples. A shame I didn't get a big fuck-off bottle of brain bleach for Christmas. FML

#20422121
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29491) - you deserved it (7739)

On 12/25/2012 at 8:49pm - intimacy - by FuckMyEyes (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML

#20419819
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82041) - you deserved it (25233)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She looked pretty thin, so to make her feel better, I said that she looked small. She said "Well, you haven't seen me naked." For some reason, I replied, "Not that you know of." FML

#20417936
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15154) - you deserved it (35040)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

#20417691
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55584) - you deserved it (9876)

On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, because my boyfriend drives a 2-seated sports car, I had to awkwardly sit on his brother's lap as we drove to the store. I soon felt a poking sensation through his pants, just a few minutes before we hit a bumpy road. FML

#20414298
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48745) - you deserved it (6171)

On 12/22/2012 at 5:55pm - intimacy - by orgasmicriding (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I have a very uncomfortable cyst in my armpit and a sprained ankle both on my right side, resulting in me limping and keeping my arm awkwardly plastered to my side. My fiancé keeps walking like me and calling me Igor, saying "Yes, Master" whenever I ask him for something. FML

#20406767
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30112) - you deserved it (3656)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:16am - health - by Igor (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had plans for a romantic night with my boyfriend, who is perfect in every way possible. We were going to have sex for the first time as well. Unfortunately, I had a dream last night about him shitting all over me and I can't look at him with a straight face. FML

#20403258
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35288) - you deserved it (13812)

On 12/17/2012 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I saw my crush at the grocery store. He saw me and started walking towards me. I got so excited that I farted when he came near. FML

#20402614
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34031) - you deserved it (9173)

On 12/16/2012 at 7:58pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I'm insanely hungover from a long night of drinking. I'm going to my nephew's baptism in an hour as his godmother. FML

#20402048
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6825) - you deserved it (49730)

On 12/16/2012 at 12:26pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: