About AxJxA : I'm just here for some good laughs.
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
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Socialite
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Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19469) - you deserved it (3044)
On 10/06/2011 at 6:20am - misc - by kemando - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20165) - you deserved it (6892)
On 09/28/2011 at 12:55am - intimacy - by confused (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, while at work, after reading more than 100 FMLs and moderating more than 500, I decided to write one of my own with the help of my boss, who had been standing next to me for over an hour. "How about being fired?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (7987) - you deserved it (37197)
On 09/21/2011 at 2:47am - work - by f_ck_U (man) - China (Zhejiang)
Today, my boyfriend admitted that on his last visit, he snuck into the laundry and stole a lacy black thong he assumed was mine. It wasn't. It was my dad's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28557) - you deserved it (2477)
On 08/05/2011 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)
Today, I realized that as a U.S. Marine in the infantry, I'm more afraid to talk to girls than I am of getting shot at. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34275) - you deserved it (4134)
On 08/03/2011 at 3:40am - love - by Tim - United States
Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday. I now know how my sister is paying for her new car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45947) - you deserved it (5586)
On 07/23/2011 at 8:09pm - misc - by assante2010 - United States (Maine)
Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31592) - you deserved it (18210)
On 03/03/2011 at 6:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend said "It's funny how every time we have sex I'm wearing these panties." We've been having sex every day for the last six days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39685) - you deserved it (5056)
On 02/16/2011 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Lovenem (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I found out that the candy bracelet my sister gave me a few days ago was actually a candy cock ring she'd used on her boyfriend just a few hours prior. Apparently, she didn't like the taste. I however, did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30787) - you deserved it (3412)
On 02/14/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)
Today, my boyfriend woke me up by playing with the string of my tampon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36954) - you deserved it (4694)
On 02/13/2011 at 4:32am - intimacy - by Eva - Sent from mobile version
Today, I realized how out of shape I am, when I couldn't finish masturbating because I ran out of breath. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12318) - you deserved it (46739)
On 02/13/2011 at 4:01am - intimacy - by RyanM - Canada (Alberta)
Today, while shopping in the baby department at a local department store, a woman approached me asking when I was due. I told her that I was due in 4 months. I lied. I'm not pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13025) - you deserved it (20999)
On 02/12/2011 at 2:50am - misc - by Liar Liar - United States
Today, my girlfriend's parents walked in on us having sex. Not only did her dad make me walk out to my truck with no clothes on, he is my baseball coach and I will be seeing him on Monday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26455) - you deserved it (14469)
On 02/12/2011 at 12:59am - intimacy - by Keith walk - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend. I texted her and I would never talk to her again. But I accidentally sent it to my other best friend, who responded, "I'm so sorry, I never meant for you to find out". My two best friends cheated with my boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47856) - you deserved it (3375)
On 02/12/2011 at 12:19am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out that applying toothpaste to your penis to make it taste good for your girlfriend is not a good idea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6834) - you deserved it (64015)
On 02/11/2011 at 12:51am - intimacy - by Zibby -
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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