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AshyTurtle

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AshyTurtle

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 6 April 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 309
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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AshyTurtle's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my daughter's room with clean laundry. I found her lying on her bed with a hand down her pants, totally zoned out and staring blankly at the Justin Bieber poster on her wall. FML

#20529387
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43881) - you deserved it (6705)

On 03/03/2013 at 12:03pm - misc - by parental failure (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my new dog unburied my old dog and chewed on his bones. FML

#19520416
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43348) - you deserved it (3132)

On 04/24/2012 at 1:42am - animals - by jessica071509 - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found a bug under my foreskin. FML

#19318409
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29061) - you deserved it (18992)

On 03/21/2012 at 12:50am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, after moving house, changing my number, my email, and beginning legal action to get away from a girl who was stalking me, I decided to go to the movies to relax. As soon as I got in my seat, that same girl walked into the nearly empty theatre. She sat next to me. FML

#13723810
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35537) - you deserved it (2687)

On 11/05/2010 at 5:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had lunch with some important potential clients at a fancy restaurant. I really wanted to make a good impression. When the piano music stopped, I started clapping while looking around for the pianist. Apparently, it was a CD. FML

#5953871
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9723) - you deserved it (35370)

On 10/23/2009 at 1:01am - work - by E.S. (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, for my birthday, my mom presented me with a $4,000 check to pay for my braces. I've been very self-conscious about my teeth for years. Everyone applauded and told me how happy they were for me. Later, my mom asked me for the check back. Apparently it was just meant to make her look good. FML

#4859599
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64583) - you deserved it (2348)

On 08/27/2009 at 1:23pm - money - by crookedteeth (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was working at the mall as the girl that stands around giving out samples of the foods. This guy came up to me and we were flirting for at least 30 mins. With the tray in one hand, I gave him my cell to put his number in it. He ran away with my phone. FML

#3577359
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21702) - you deserved it (42144)

On 07/08/2009 at 8:08am - work - by joybirdnot_13 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at walmart when my stomach began to hurt. I quickly waddled to the restroom in pain. As soon as I got in the stall, a huge crap exploded out of me. The child in the stall next to me started crying. When her mom asked what was wrong she said that I'd "killed her nose". FML

#3361418
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55721) - you deserved it (8562)

On 06/30/2009 at 7:53am - health - by poopshooter101 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my siblings came home for the weekend. At dinner, my dad started complaining at how one of my siblings had gotten fired, one was failing college, and the other was gay. He went on to say I was 17 and already had a bright future. I'm pregnant. FML

#792212
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45419) - you deserved it (53874)

On 04/03/2009 at 10:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I yelled at my spouse in front of 20 guests for not coming to blow out his birthday cake candles. Turns out he was in the other room, quietly changing his disabled friend's diaper. FML

#319539
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18223) - you deserved it (188118)

On 03/14/2009 at 11:16am - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)



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