ArmyxWife

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ArmyxWife

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 363
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

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ArmyxWife's page activity

Visits<b>hellobobismyname</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 6:49am<b>One_Way</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 11:29pm<b>poopsiepants</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 5:32am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 6:09am<b>Quackadoodledoo</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 5:08pm<b>Amiiii</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 4:07pm<b>Nicky816</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 1:52pm<b>missy_nina</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 12:12am<b>abattior</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 9:14pm<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 1:14am<b>BossMindedFemale</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 1:10am<b>SlipperyDick</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 11:26pm<b>charliebig</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 6:47pm<b>harry__r</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 10:59am<b>straww</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 11:51am<b>Oh_Really21</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 3:25pm<b>valerieodonnell</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 1:48am<b>xlxexaxhx</b> - the 04/20/2013 at 5:34pm

ArmyxWife's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of ArmyxWife's badges

ArmyxWife's favorite FMLs

Today, I was told I look like a Simpson. I don't have blond hair, or any of the features of them. So I asked which one. I was told Homer because we both could use Weight Watchers and an education. FML

by Kyle / 11/09/2012 at 1:57am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my family that I wanted to change my last name to my future wife's. We want to have the same last name, and we chose hers because she is an only child, while I have three brothers. Half of my family is laughing and calling me "pussy whipped" while the other half won't speak to me. FML

by new name / 11/06/2012 at 5:03pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

by thebeachisthatway / 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML

by habbsrule / 06/15/2012 at 10:21am / Canada / Kids

Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML

by girly girly / 05/26/2012 at 10:42am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my fiancé and I appeared in the paper for obtaining our marriage license. In the same column half way down his parents appeared for filing their marriage dissolution petition. FML

by Queen_Dread / 05/04/2012 at 3:19am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML

by girly / 04/12/2012 at 12:06am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML

by erockinthesuburb / 04/11/2012 at 12:25pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML

by azmom / 03/27/2012 at 1:51pm / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, my mom was put in jail for beating the shit out of my dad. FML

by Taylor Easley / 03/17/2012 at 12:53am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my history teacher confiscated my iPhone. She dropped it on the way back to her desk, and I now have a shattered iPhone screen to fix. FML

by sad face / 03/07/2012 at 2:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my girlfriend out for a fancy dinner to celebrate our anniversary. When the waitress came, we instantly recognized each other. She was the girl I'd had a one night stand with a few weeks before. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2012 at 4:49pm / Canada / Love

Today, I was dumped. My boyfriend was too afraid to break up with me, so he sent the girl he cheated on me with. FML

by Nanabanana1 / 02/06/2012 at 8:23pm / United States / Love

Today, I found out that Google+ has been automatically uploading my cell phone pictures as I take them. My friends have now seen pictures of me, my penis, and other things too horrifying to talk about. FML

by brannie / 01/29/2012 at 7:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous