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ArmoredSandwich

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ArmoredSandwich
  • Town/Country : Amsterdam, The Kingdom of the Netherlands
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 23 March 1990 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 40263
  • Number of comments : 63
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ArmoredSandwich's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up, completely naked, in bed with a guy I met the night before. We were both drunk the night before and I had agreed to go home with him. The reason I woke up was that someone was knocking on his bedroom door. Turns out he lives with his mom and she made us pancakes. FML

#429248
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29599) - you deserved it (81637)

On 03/17/2009 at 11:15pm - intimacy - by Nikki (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, me and my boyfriend came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good my phone rings. It was a text from my mom, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML

#415809
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92146) - you deserved it (42637)

On 03/17/2009 at 4:40pm - intimacy - by MrAwsum (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I ran for the train that was about to leave. I tried to hold the doors open with my leg and got stuck. The conductor just yelled out how unbelievable and ridiculous I was and waited 2 minutes to finally release me. Everyone was laughing at me. FML

#332673
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36520) - you deserved it (14398)

On 03/14/2009 at 11:56pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while I was babysitting, the toddler was feeding me banana slices from her tray while I was cutting up clay for her to mold. It was all fine until she shoved something hard and crunchy into my mouth. I immediately spat it out into my hand. It was a dead cricket she found on the floor. FML

#331058
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54826) - you deserved it (8171)

On 03/14/2009 at 10:27pm - misc - by storyofmylife - United States



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