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Aquamarine's favorite FMLs
by insideout / 05/10/2009 at 4:25pm / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy
Today, I was looking at my recommendations on Amazon, which included several vibrators. Just a few days earlier I was looking at books on anger management. Amazon thinks I need to get laid. They're right. FML
by Anonymous / 04/24/2009 at 6:53pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, I took a big sip of water while on a bus. It went down the wrong pipe, causing me to cough and hack loudly. The old woman sitting across from me asked if I was okay. Jokingly, I said, "Just dying." She replied, "You too, huh?" FML
by suicide / 02/04/2009 at 10:48am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation
by marlow / 01/14/2009 at 9:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
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- Today, I got sexually excited thinking about what kind of donuts I wanted to get in the morning. FML Today, my girlfriend found my list of women I've had sex with, complete with the ratings I'd given… Today, my girlfriend hid my car keys and decided that she wouldn't give them back until I succeeded…
- Today, my boyfriend whispered to me, “I’m so tired of these fucking mosquitos.” When I asked why he… Today, I couldn't get into my car. I got mad at the lock, and my key broken inside it. It wasn't my… Today, I’m in Sweden. This morning, I went out to get the mail in my pajamas. Well, it doesn’t only…