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Applecoral

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Applecoral

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 876
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Applecoral's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Applecoral's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML

#16234467
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65148) - you deserved it (4472)

On 05/18/2011 at 3:57am - intimacy - by Jackedup (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, our cable, internet, and home phone got shut off because my mother-in-law decided that since we are moving, it was easier to not pay the bill rather than close the account. We're not moving for another month and the account was under my name. FML

#16204645
116 comments

Today, I found out that my grandma has been sending me birthday money every year. My mom just steals it before I ever see it. FML

#16168772
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51698) - you deserved it (2937)

On 05/14/2011 at 7:40am - money - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML

#16168666
374 comments

I agree, your life sucks (110906) - you deserved it (15440)

On 05/14/2011 at 7:15am - intimacy - by ali grace - United States (Texas)

Today, on the first day of my nanny job, I wanted to impress my employers with how trustworthy and responsible I am. During the sixty seconds that I went to pee, the two-year-old found a black Sharpie and scribbled all over the wall. Nail polish remover made it ten times worse. FML

#16167560
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29122) - you deserved it (7405)

On 05/14/2011 at 2:50am - kids - by whytoday - United States

Today, I found out I was born as a result of someone switching my mom's birth control pills with tic tac. FML

#16129484
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44314) - you deserved it (3764)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I realized that I give the computer screen a thumbs up whenever I see something cool. I work on computers in front of people all day. FML

#16112747
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13168) - you deserved it (22493)

On 05/09/2011 at 11:44pm - work - by helen -

Today, while on a first date with a guy who turned out to be twice my age, we were playing video games at the theatre before the movie started. Suddenly he falls face first while having a seizure. The EMT asked if my "dad" had a history of epilepsy. FML

#16030351
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18687) - you deserved it (27789)

On 05/03/2011 at 8:15am - love - by cbolig -

Today, a kid with severe Down's came into my workplace, as he does every day. He's has an obsession with me, sitting at a table, staring and taking photos of me all day. His parents have no problem with this, because they think it's a miracle that he can focus so much attention on me for so long. FML

#15935397
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34512) - you deserved it (5932)

On 04/26/2011 at 3:25pm - misc - by notimpressed (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I dislocated my arm while trying to escape from underneath a flipped over kayak. Who saved me? My two brothers-in-law. Who didn't? My husband, because his "feet were hurting." FML

#15900824
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35003) - you deserved it (3756)

On 04/23/2011 at 8:08pm - love - by crizzy - United States

Today, I was listening to my son's teacher gossip about students whilst in the grocery store. I was thrilled when she described my son as "A model student". However, she then went on to say, "Which is surprising considering that his parents are trailer trash." FML

#15895508
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40671) - you deserved it (7647)

On 04/23/2011 at 5:26am - kids - by kindgartin (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I ran into a guy who I was completely in love with for months. After a couple of minutes, I realised he totally bores me senseless. What a waste of 4 months obsessing over that shithead. FML

#15872147
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14213) - you deserved it (58902)

On 04/21/2011 at 10:44am - love - by EmDa (woman) - India

Today, I painted a kids room at my new nanny job while the dad "helped" by staring at my ass and telling me how hard it is to position your "junk" correctly when wearing a speedo. First day on the job. FML

#15865508
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37832) - you deserved it (3432)

On 04/20/2011 at 9:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML

#15858919
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44412) - you deserved it (10293)

On 04/20/2011 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by Andrew - United States

Today, my manager told me to throw out some of the old toys at the daycare we work at. I can't because I've seen Toy Story 3, and thinking about them in a dump makes me cry. I'm 28. FML

#15852392
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32938) - you deserved it (16539)

On 04/19/2011 at 10:29pm - work - by Stupid (woman) - United States



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