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Today, I received a phone call from my father asking how I spelled my name. Not only was he the parent who picked out my name, he was completely serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18949) - you deserved it (1380)
On 03/07/2010 at 3:18am - misc - by crimson28 (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, my boss made me some tortellini for lunch. As I was happily eating it, he started to give me a massage, while talking to his friends in Greek. He told me that he said "She's my #1 cashier." Turns out, what he really said was "See, if you feed them well, they let you touch them." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21022) - you deserved it (4007)
On 02/23/2010 at 12:17am - work - by meaganlea (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I found out that the 20% pay cut that the "management team" took at my job really only applied to... me. I also found out that my closest friend at work has been lying to me about it, and telling my boss everything I say. His pay was never cut. I guess it pays to be the boss's snitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16383) - you deserved it (1397)
On 02/19/2010 at 10:13pm - work - by monochromatic - United States (New York)
Today, I lost the beautiful necklace my boyfriend gave me for Valentine's day. I looked everywhere, and couldn't find it. My sister held the bag while I dug through the stinking trash, then after I cleaned everything up, took it out of her pocket and said she was pretending it was lost. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21168) - you deserved it (1711)
On 02/19/2010 at 8:54pm - kids - by beezybees (woman) - United States (California)
Today, it's my 18th birthday. Last month was my best friend's 18th birthday. She spent the night with me, and the next morning, my mom and brother gathered in my room and sang "Happy Birthday" as they handed her pancakes with a candle on top. Today, I was woken up by screams to take the trash out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23312) - you deserved it (1589)
On 02/17/2010 at 2:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I went to the shops with my little sister. We had to walk through the lingerie section of the store to get to another part. My sister then yells at the top of her voice 'stop following me you freak'. I had security escort me out of the store, and got many dirty looks. She thought it was hilarious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22026) - you deserved it (2280)
On 02/16/2010 at 3:18am - misc - by Timv86 (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to be a stripper when she grew up, just like daddy's girlfriend. We're still married. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31727) - you deserved it (2578)
On 02/15/2010 at 1:58pm - love - by ShayisPay101 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I switched cell phone carriers and got the plan where you can call or text any five people for free. The employee asked for my five, I could only come up with one, my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17895) - you deserved it (3998)
On 02/13/2010 at 2:22am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I was carrying a hot cup of noodles. I sneezed and accidentally stabbed myself in the forehead with a fork. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18332) - you deserved it (4297)
On 02/11/2010 at 1:35pm - misc - by Nick (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14114) - you deserved it (3961)
On 02/11/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by syl - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23370) - you deserved it (5822)
On 02/10/2010 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was working when an older lady came up to buy a coffee. Her son cried for a cup of whipped cream to snack on. She shook her head, silently telling me to say no. I said we were out. The mother took her drink and said, "I'm sorry honey, but the mean man said you couldn't have any." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23270) - you deserved it (2414)
On 02/09/2010 at 10:32pm - work - by nichaneely (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I realized the only reason I watched the SuperBowl is because Justin Bieber tweeted about it. I don't even like football. I had no idea what was going on the whole game. All I knew was who I was cheering for, because Justin Bieber tweeted who he was cheering for. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6534) - you deserved it (55178)
On 02/08/2010 at 3:00am - love - by loveeyou. - Sent from mobile version
Today, I work at McDonalds. I burned my hand while cleaning their grill and have a 2nd/3rd degree burn from my pinky to my wrist. When told about this, my manager told me that there was "nothing that they could do for me and to tough it out". However I was given a free McFlurry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23043) - you deserved it (3840)
On 02/06/2010 at 8:19pm - work - by Enrique (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was in the bathroom getting ready to take a shower. I took all of my clothes off, and stepped into the shower facing the knobs. When I turned around, I saw somebody standing in there with me. Apparently, my little brother and his friend were playing hide and seek, and I found his friend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30994) - you deserved it (3987)
On 01/29/2010 at 7:02pm - misc - by soonaked (woman) - United States (New York)
Monday 17 June 2013
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