Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Anumayis

Online | Search for a member

Anumayis

1Liked!

AnumayisAnumayis
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 22 October 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3519
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Anumayis : I'm a girl. just thought the blue edge looked nicer. :)

Anumayis's page activity

Visits<b>Chelsea_bella</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 11:22pm<b>Lct1196</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 11:28pm<b>2i1337i2iscore</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 7:05pm<b>Ausdank</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 11:10pm<b>lifeof_toad</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 9:14am<b>Jessie_baby1316</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 6:20am<b>IAreBox</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 4:50pm<b>LiiaaBee</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 4:14am<b>deshin13</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 12:02am<b>turtle306</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 1:53pm<b>Dramori</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 9:37am<b>csbe1980</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 1:07pm<b>Tyde</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 4:23am<b>CrackCrazedMonky</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 10:04pm<b>DepartmentStore</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 4:33pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 11:12am<b>BrandyFaye</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 8:24pm<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 2:47pm

Liked!<b>CrackCrazedMonky</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 4:04am

Anumayis's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

See all of Anumayis's badges

Anumayis's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
476 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47212) - you deserved it (4373)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, I noticed my nephew has blue eyes, freckles and dimples which don't run in my family or my sister's husband's family, but they do run in my husband's family. FML

#19581290
326 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37122) - you deserved it (3701)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:53am - misc - by Damn (woman) - Australia

Today, I came home from the minimum-wage job I suffer through to support my now ex-boyfriend's ailing music career. It seems his time management skills suck almost as badly as his music, because I found him in my bedroom, licking whipped cream off my step-sister. FML

#19577163
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30858) - you deserved it (3945)

On 05/05/2012 at 12:28pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I had food poisoning. When I was finally able to drag myself to the kitchen for some Gatorade, I got stung by a wasp. FML

#19575961
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22507) - you deserved it (1884)

On 05/05/2012 at 3:19am - health - by markzar - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my husband informed me that he has been purposely finishing before me in bed as a form of punishment for beating him at Mario Kart. FML

#19563136
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31492) - you deserved it (6141)

On 05/02/2012 at 11:46am - intimacy - by winnerwinner (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend yet again unsuccessfully tried to hold in uncontrollable giggling every time I moaned or sighed during sex. He's 24. I'm terrified of his reaction should I ever reach an orgasm with him. FML

#19557308
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26705) - you deserved it (2959)

On 05/01/2012 at 7:02am - intimacy - by epicsquishii (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned the hard way not to take off your shirt with a toothpick in your mouth. FML

#19521815
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6888) - you deserved it (25174)

On 04/24/2012 at 12:36pm - health - by monkeycannon7 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to blow-dry the sweat off her armpits instead of showering. FML

#19454762
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23531) - you deserved it (2736)

On 04/12/2012 at 8:51am - misc - by crazydaughter - Egypt

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML

#19453436
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18252) - you deserved it (47455)

On 04/12/2012 at 12:06am - intimacy - by girly (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to put my bra on. FML

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while giving me head. FML

#19335521
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25899) - you deserved it (5398)

On 03/23/2012 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by justgreat - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend went down on me with whiskey in his mouth. It felt like my genitals were on fire. FML

#19324348
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25081) - you deserved it (6118)

On 03/22/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, the subject of penis size came up while my boyfriend and I were chatting. He asked if he was big, and I replied that whatever size he was, he was enough to satisfy me. Apparently, that was the wrong answer, and he spent the rest of the night sulking because I didn't say he was enormous. FML

#19320127
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25299) - you deserved it (12622)

On 03/21/2012 at 12:25pm - intimacy - by tellingthetruth (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to a snake. Not because of the size or shape, but because a snake is not something she imagines herself ever touching. FML

#19281835
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28496) - you deserved it (3170)

On 03/15/2012 at 7:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my therapist clapped for me when I told her I'd made a friend. FML

#19195377
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26026) - you deserved it (3408)

On 03/01/2012 at 12:12pm - misc - by ohdang - United States (Illinois)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: