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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Today, I was watching tv with my grandpa, and he stops flipping channels on a movie with a hot naked chick getting oiled down. Suddenly the remote lands on my stomach as my mom and grandma walk in the door. They yelled at me for being a pervert for an hour, while my grandpa sat and chuckled. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29626) - you deserved it (3188)
On 09/24/2010 at 6:22am - misc - by Andrew - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was getting picked up by my dad after I had been swimming. I saw his car, so I walked over to it, got in and started talking about how I'd seen my brother. It wasn't until after I had put my seat belt on that I realized I was talking to a complete stranger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14025) - you deserved it (17439)
On 09/18/2010 at 10:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Monmouthshire)
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend who's sick, he told me he felt sleepy due to meds and was going to bed. I jokingly said, "you're going to call your other girlfriend, aren't you?" There was silence before I heard, "you weren't supposed to find out like this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39536) - you deserved it (2935)
On 09/16/2010 at 12:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I found out that the man who came into work yesterday, the man who tried to grope me from over the counter, the one who spat his drink in my face, the one who kicked me in the shins when he didn't like the way his food tasted, is a regular and I can expect him three times a week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22551) - you deserved it (1508)
On 09/12/2010 at 12:52pm - work - by yeahno (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I came home to my wife crying. She had mixed up our newborn twin girls and couldn't tell which was which. I looked at the girls. Neither could I. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42880) - you deserved it (6018)
Today, the elevator broke in my dorm and won't be fixed for several days. I live on the 26th floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31648) - you deserved it (3038)
On 09/02/2010 at 1:39pm - misc - by flimflam (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was forced to spend an extra $318 for another plane ticket to Dallas. The ticket wasn't for my daughter, my mom, or my sister, but for the quarter of my butt that apparently needs its own seat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14997) - you deserved it (7201)
On 08/31/2010 at 5:40pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31597) - you deserved it (5906)
On 08/31/2010 at 10:48am - love - by maebyf - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was in the car going to a concert with my family. I was listening to my iPod, when the wheel broke and I couldn't change the song. So for the rest of the trip, I was stuck either listening to my parents arguing, or Don't Worry, Be Happy by Bobby McFerrin on repeat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19125) - you deserved it (4184)
On 08/28/2010 at 2:07am - misc - by dontworrybehappy (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I had to confront my boyfriend after finding a girl's phone number next to my bed. He said I was over reacting. When I told him it was over, he asked for the number back so he could call her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22988) - you deserved it (6194)
On 08/26/2010 at 12:11am - love - by tj - United States
Today, I found out that my brother is engaged to marry an ex-girlfriend of mine. This comes almost two months after my brother divorced ANOTHER ex-girlfriend of mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30565) - you deserved it (2151)
On 08/24/2010 at 8:19am - love - by groomsman (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He also decided the best way to end our relationship was to kill me and our virtual child on The Sims 3 by setting us on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31181) - you deserved it (5737)
On 08/19/2010 at 1:26am - love - by Single - United States (California)
Today, my fiancé invited his pregnant co-worker for dinner. After we finished eating, he sat down and explained to me that her kid is his and that he's been cheating on me with her for 5 months. She had a smile on her face during the entire thing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62925) - you deserved it (3133)
On 08/03/2010 at 8:11am - love - by Broken (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Abu Dhabi)
Today, I was coaching at a swim meet. I heard a few of my swimmers screaming about a huge wasp on my head, so I told everyone to stay calm because we didn't want to upset the wasp. Unfortunately, I was interrupted by another coach from our team hitting me repeatedly on the head with a clipboard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22039) - you deserved it (1938)
On 08/01/2010 at 8:20pm - health - by Doodle (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I had to get bloodwork done. I'm deathly afraid of needles. The whole lobby heard me scream as soon as the nurse said 'hello'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13064) - you deserved it (18032)
On 07/24/2010 at 6:50am - health - by breathexali (woman) - United States (New York)
Friday 24 May 2013
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