Amkii

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Amkii

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 267417
  • Number of comments : 786
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

About Amkii : lol :)

Amkii's page activity

Visits<b>benjamin03</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 6:16pm<b>Gruffplatypus87</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 7:33am<b>TheSiraffe</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 4:54pm<b>Kaamil</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 2:00am<b>MenacingMe</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 12:45pm<b>kyletg09</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 11:07pm<b>Sayori101</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 8:22pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 8:45am<b>holymacabre</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 10:15am<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 9:55am<b>rootbeercheese8</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 9:45pm<b>helloimclaudia</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 4:40pm<b>Jarod11191</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 1:47pm<b>nMasty</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 3:08pm<b>MyWierdCat</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 4:03pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 4:12am<b>bravoal923</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 2:59pm<b>CriminalScrub</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 2:18pm

Fucked!<b>Kira_the_killer</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 7:34am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 3:47pm<b>megatron2416</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 2:53pm

Amkii's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Amkii's favorite FMLs

Today, a creepy man on the subway said he liked my eyeballs. It was the best compliment I've received in months. FML

by Noname / 03/04/2009 at 7:29pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

by Señor Guapo / 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I slipped on the ice in front of my apartment, spraining my ankle and cracking a rib. While I laid on the ground immediately after, my neighbor chewed me out for saying "shit" in front of her 4-year-old on my way down. FML

by stupidneighbor / 03/04/2009 at 12:03pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, to remind myself to write a check for my speech and debate team (Lynbrook Speech and Debate), I wrote "LSD money" on the back of my hand. The Vice Principal saw it, dragged me to the office, and called my parents. FML

by gonkc / 03/04/2009 at 2:05am / United States (California) / Money

Today, I was walking to my car tonight when I saw a large man walking behind me, I hurried to open my car as he was approaching quickly, my door wasn't unlocking and I panicked. It was then I noticed it wasnt even my car. As I walked away from the other car, he walked up and unlocked the door. FML

by Fantastic / 03/03/2009 at 11:19pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, in the fitting room at Old Navy, a customer asked me if we sold Calvin Klein jeans. I replied "no ma'am, this isn't a department store, we only sell Old Navy jeans." She left, and complained to my manager, who informed me that "the customer is always right." FML

by samantha / 03/03/2009 at 7:18pm / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, a guy who I've been on five dates with called me for the first time in 2 weeks. The first thing I said was, "Don't expect me to go out with you again after going AWOL on me." Then he told me his mom died. FML

by ouch / 03/03/2009 at 6:08pm / United States (Louisiana) / Love

Today, I was at a party and we were all playing Seven Minutes in Heaven. It was my crush's turn to spin the bottle so my heart started pounding. The bottle pointed towards me! Then my crush said, "With her it'd be 'Seven Minutes in Hell'. Just skip me." FML

by ILTali / 03/03/2009 at 6:00pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I was having sex with my wife when my 14 year old daughter from her room texts me, "Stop." FML

by dad / 03/03/2009 at 5:28pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, for my two-year anniversary I got my girlfriend a very expensive diamond necklace. She got me male enhancement pills. FML

by eaa145 / 03/03/2009 at 4:40pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I drove my two kids to their friends' houses. In my convertible, looking what I though was my best, I slowed down outside a bar with cute 20 year old girls in front. My daughter noticed the speed reduction and said, "Keep driving dad, you're fat and mom left you for a reason." FML

by Fat Dad / 03/03/2009 at 4:27pm / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend asked me what I enjoyed most about the weekend we'd spent together. I mention in detail a certain move he had pulled when we made love. When asked what he enjoyed most, he replies "putting my fish tank together". FML

by lucy / 03/03/2009 at 12:55am / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, the fitting room of the store I worked in smelled really bad. The customers started to complain and since I was on fitting room duty I went to go investigate. A middle aged woman pooped on the floor and then put the chair on top to cover it. FML

by fittingroompotty / 03/02/2009 at 8:38am / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, I was babysitting this one year old. She just learned how to say yes so if you asked her ANYTHING, she'd say yes. I asked her if she liked vegetables and she said "yes!" Then I asked her if I was pretty... she looked at me and said "NO." FML

by hi / 03/01/2009 at 3:29pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I typed an essay on my friend's computer, so she forwarded it to me in a email and she made the subject "here bitch" as a joke. I then went to email the essay to my teacher. I forwarded it thinking nothing of it only to realize that I didn't change the subject name. FML

by Brittany / 03/01/2009 at 3:00pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous