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Alitsia88

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Alitsia88
  • Town/Country : Ottawa, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 5 November 1988 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 1972
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Alitsia88 : I love life and I hate missing out on it. I love a good laugh, friends, and a good laugh with friends

Alitsia88's last visitors

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Alitsia88's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Alitsia88's badges

Alitsia88's favorite FMLs

Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML

#16101317
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38717) - you deserved it (16719)

On 05/09/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by coldwetnose (woman) - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to give his mother a box of chocolates and flowers for Mother's Day. She just stared at them and said, "What's this for? You're not my daughter, and never will be. But I'll keep the chocolate." FML

#16100276
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43600) - you deserved it (5591)

On 05/09/2011 at 12:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67080) - you deserved it (6317)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML

#14614726
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14478) - you deserved it (38237) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, while grocery shopping, my Dad asked me what I wanted for 'Din-Dins' while scratching his nuts. In a crowded aisle. Wearing short shorts. FML

#13071256
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25696) - you deserved it (2619)

On 09/16/2010 at 5:04am - misc - by itchybollos - Australia

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

#13005397
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33562) - you deserved it (9135)

On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML

#7059042
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32008) - you deserved it (15289)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by pottypattypeepants (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She told me that her father didn't approve of me and forced her out of the relationship. Her father died 2 years ago. FML

#2273679
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61850) - you deserved it (3196)

On 05/25/2009 at 12:43pm - love - by nadette (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was straightening my hair when I heard this crunching, sizzling sound. Taking the flat iron away, I realized that I had just fused a spider to my hair with the heat. FML

#2207384
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56482) - you deserved it (5663)

On 05/23/2009 at 10:03am - animals - by beatricesank (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to my best friend's birthday party. After about 15 minutes, I noticed a girl, possibly one of his sisters friends, wearing the same shirt as me. I am a 23 year old bloke. She didn't look a day over 14. FML

#2205796
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31378) - you deserved it (8764)

On 05/23/2009 at 6:53am - misc - by bluewinter (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while teaching English in Korea, my boss gave me a birthday present from her and all of my co-workers. It was a really fancy box. It had very nice wrapping. It had a pretty bow. It was kind of heavy. It was 6 bottles of dandruff shampoo. FML

#1892907
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42061) - you deserved it (7547)

On 05/13/2009 at 12:39am - work - by eslteacher (man) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I learned that I have carpal tunnel syndrome. I got it from playing too much World of Warcraft. I got a disease in real life by living in a virtual world. FML

#1879175
368 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22787) - you deserved it (133683)

On 05/12/2009 at 6:05pm - health - by Loser (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was in line for Star Trek and chatting with another couple about a guy who came to the movie wearing a Starfleet uniform. We were having a good snicker about this "Geek" until my cell phone rang. My ringtone is the sound made by the Star Trek communicator. FML

#1869680
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5837) - you deserved it (72851)

On 05/12/2009 at 10:11am - misc - by Ottawa (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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