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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, I was selling personalised stockings at work. When handing a customer's order over to her, which had no name on, I joked, "Oooh this is a bit mysterious". She replied, "Actually, it's in memory of the baby I miscarried earlier this year." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22176) - you deserved it (6981)
On 10/24/2010 at 9:06am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)
Today, I was having the most wonderful bath. The water was steaming, the bubbles were bubbly, and I was reading a really good book. I put my book down to yawn and looked to my right. My gaze was met by the lovely face of my brother's pet tarantula. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27112) - you deserved it (2478)
On 10/24/2010 at 8:21am - misc - by mzgabbster (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, I found dried cum in my hair - after being at work for two hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10260) - you deserved it (31486)
On 10/24/2010 at 3:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, while I was substitute teaching a middle school class, a boy, named Chris, refused to get in the boy's line for the bathroom. After I had said, "Chris, what makes you think you're a girl?" in a very loud voice, one of the other students said "She is a girl." I've scarred a child for life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9692) - you deserved it (40092)
On 10/24/2010 at 1:26am - kids - by badteacher (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I decided to be adventurous and give my boyfriend head in the downstairs tv room. Just as he was about to cum I heard someone walking towards the door. I took my mouth off to get up and lock the door just as he came. Didn't make it to the door but my dad saw something he will never forget. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8780) - you deserved it (25956)
On 10/24/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by stickyface (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I had two 100's and two singles in my wallet. The two 100's was for my electric bill and the two singles were for the bus. Once I got off the bus and to the electric company, I noticed only my singles were there. Turns out I paid the bus driver $200. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12012) - you deserved it (26057)
On 10/24/2010 at 12:37am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my girlfriend came over to me, like she was going to kiss me, and instead rubbed her chin all over my face, exclaiming, "Can you feel my beard coming in?" Yes, yes I could. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30494) - you deserved it (2844)
On 10/24/2010 at 12:11am - love - by altocrm - Sent from mobile version
Today, a woman got out of a car to scream at me as I was walking with the kids I babysit, demanding to know where I was taking her children. Apparently the woman who pays me is also a babysitter, who I have been "covering" for on her party nights. The mother doesn't believe I didn't know this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26819) - you deserved it (1736)
On 10/23/2010 at 8:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was sitting on a plane waiting for everyone to get on. A cute guy around my age had the option of sitting next to me or an old guy. He gave me a horrified look and immediately sat next to the old man. I got to sit next to his mother. She evil eyed me the whole time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18406) - you deserved it (2264)
On 10/23/2010 at 8:50pm - misc - by ugly me - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was at a movie theater. I heard some obnoxious people talking in front of me. After about 5 minutes, I began throwing popcorn at a group of suspected people. As I was escorted out, I realized that the obnoxious people were in the background of the movie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3268) - you deserved it (34252)
On 10/23/2010 at 7:14pm - misc - by escortedout (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my parents told me about how they met. I'd already known they were eight years apart, but I never knew my dad started dating my mom when he was 21 and she was 13. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43453) - you deserved it (3142)
On 10/23/2010 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I found out that the reason I'm working as a kitchen staff instead of out on the floor of the café is because the boss does not think I'm attractive enough. My boss is my brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21572) - you deserved it (2655)
Today, I got very drunk after being fired from my job. In my depressed, intoxicated state, I posted my facebook status as 'Goodbye world'. The only response was from my dad saying 'cya'. His comment got 29 likes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33369) - you deserved it (9146)
On 10/23/2010 at 9:15am - misc - by drunkfacebookuser (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my boyfriend said he wants a Hello Kitty wedding. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31420) - you deserved it (6826)
On 10/23/2010 at 5:07am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I flew to California to visit my younger sister at college. When I got to her house, her boyfriend looks at her and says, "Shes not THAT ugly." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20231) - you deserved it (1793)
On 10/22/2010 at 8:57pm - misc - by annonymus - United States (Wisconsin)
Monday 20 May 2013
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