AdrastosArmor

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Offline (the 11/09/2014 at 4:34am)

AdrastosArmor

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 April 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 12913
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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AdrastosArmor's page activity

Visits<b>theawkwardlife</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 8:07pm<b>Clam_igger</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 6:58am<b>alicealiveordead</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 7:50am<b>cooltatgar</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 5:40pm<b>lorellecaimyth</b> - the 05/27/2013 at 2:22am<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 2:08pm<b>JohnBoyFsYL</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 5:11pm<b>NaomiOchoa</b> - the 03/27/2013 at 11:41pm<b>waffule365</b> - the 03/16/2013 at 7:04pm<b>whatismyusername</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 11:57pm<b>Wolvander88</b> - the 01/19/2013 at 10:11am<b>Feelsgood</b> - the 01/12/2013 at 6:26pm<b>firegirl1993</b> - the 01/11/2013 at 2:26am<b>BlitheNightmare</b> - the 01/09/2013 at 4:32am<b>BrettBeets</b> - the 01/06/2013 at 3:05am<b>DudeEvil</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 7:43pm<b>n3rdzgotskillz</b> - the 01/04/2013 at 7:13pm

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AdrastosArmor's favorite FMLs

Today, an hour after having been turned down for sex, I walked in on my wife fingering herself to a copy of War and Peace. FML

by Anonymous / 11/25/2012 at 4:34pm / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Intimacy

Today, I was playing with my four year old cousin. He had a toy whale and said, "Shark!" I corrected him and told him it was a whale. He picked it up, threw it at my face, and yelled, "SHAAARK!" FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2012 at 8:59am / United States / Kids

Today, a co-worker asked me if I have a Facebook account, and I said I do. I had to politely smile as he spent the next half hour insulting me for supposedly being glued to it 24/7, before claiming that it's all a CIA front to steal people's social security details. Why are nutjobs like this even alive? FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2012 at 7:49pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, my mom sold my Magic box at a garage sale because I "never use it." Locked inside it was my fake ID, a couple of hundred bucks, and a bag of weed. She can't remember who she sold it to. FML

by karmaquestionmark / 11/19/2012 at 9:04pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend claimed she was a Viking because she's pale and has blond hair. She also warned me that if I piss her off she'll go 'berserk' on me. She demonstrated by smacking me in the nuts with a wooden spoon. FML

by jasmith / 11/18/2012 at 2:45am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my girlfriend admitted to me that she has been sleeping with someone on her girls basketball team, which at first turned me on. Then I found out he's the team manager. FML

by SweetStuff88 / 11/15/2012 at 8:37am / United States / Love

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out I share a birthday with a fictional character who is "untrustworthy" and has a "dark side", so therefore I can't be trusted either. FML

by B-Rad / 11/15/2012 at 12:48am / United States / Love

Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML

by Med / 11/13/2012 at 7:02am / Netherlands (Groningen) / Love

Today, we found out that the beloved "Uncle Jimmy" from my early childhood was really the man my mother was cheating on my dad with. FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2012 at 3:53pm / New Zealand (Gisborne) / Miscellaneous

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

by SebastianMiko / 11/09/2012 at 2:18am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I had my first orgasm. I also came to the realization that whenever I orgasm I get an uncontrollable case of hiccups for at least half an hour afterwards. FML

by hiccups / 11/03/2012 at 11:52am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend did the walk of shame in a skimpy Halloween costume after a night of drunken sex. Problem? The walk ended at my doorstep, and the sex was with a stranger. FML

by heartbroke / 11/03/2012 at 6:02am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

by ananymous / 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down for a talk, only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore, for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML

by Anonymous / 10/27/2012 at 3:28pm / Germany (Bayern) / Kids

Today, my grandma took it upon herself to give me the sex talk. After explaining the mechanics in excessive detail, she said I shouldn't be afraid to sleep around. Apparently, I need to be comfortable with the man who'll be "conning me into blowing him for the next 50 years." FML

by fiftyshardsofbroccoli / 10/26/2012 at 1:58pm / United States / Intimacy