Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

A_nonny_moose1

Offline (the 02/12/2014 at 6:35pm) | Search for a member

A_nonny_moose1

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3267
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

A_nonny_moose1's page activity

Visits<b>Rababco</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 2:44pm<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 12:19am<b>SexyQueen0905</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 11:06pm<b>sugarbooboo63</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 10:56pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 6:28pm<b>dstark26</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 4:29pm<b>bcuzmylifesucks</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 10:54am<b>TehEpicBlack</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 3:09am<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 11:44am<b>carleybeak</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 2:42pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 8:22am<b>Grace598</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 11:58pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 7:46pm<b>duckman9</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 2:19pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 5:40pm<b>HitchHiker42</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 10:02pm<b>shaaunaazee</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 1:09am<b>DaRaffers</b> - the 04/17/2013 at 6:13pm

A_nonny_moose1's FML badges

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Seen it!

You’ve watched 5 FML videos on the website, and commented on them.

See all of A_nonny_moose1's badges

A_nonny_moose1's favorite FMLs

Today, after sex, my boyfriend and I lay in bed for a couple of hours just chatting. This would have been lovely. However, his topic of choice for post-coital pillow talk was his theory about how Chewbacca is secretly the leader of the Rebel Alliance. It actually made sense. FML

#20020311
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23386) - you deserved it (6742)

On 08/14/2012 at 8:17am - intimacy - by cl4ptp (woman) - United Kingdom (Vale of Glamorgan, The)

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

#20015589
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14741) - you deserved it (38408)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML

#20011233
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19218) - you deserved it (3340)

On 08/09/2012 at 10:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my fiancé told me that he was having second thoughts on our engagement. Instead of just calling it off, he took me to a fancy restaurant and took a public poll on whether we should get married. The majority said no. FML

#20003754
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28559) - you deserved it (2092)

On 08/05/2012 at 9:20am - love - by exfiancee (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, a guy said to me, "I'd really love to see that smile back at my place." Trying to be cute, I asked him if he was single. He replied with, "No, but I am a dentist. I could definitely fix that crossbite." FML

#20003299
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22161) - you deserved it (2950)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:23am - health - by wut (woman) - United States

Today, my 15-year-old son begged me to pre-order the next season of My Little Pony. FML

#20002664
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21538) - you deserved it (6371)

On 08/04/2012 at 7:04pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was walking home from work, when a clearly homeless guy who smelled like Jimmy Hoffa's colon grabbed me, pinned me to a wall, and demanded that I hand over my "booty". I don't know whether or not I was mugged by Jack Sparrow, but either way, he's now over £100 richer. FML

#19987585
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18366) - you deserved it (1957)

On 07/27/2012 at 3:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Midlothian)

Today, my live-in-boyfriend lost his job. Jokingly, I told him that we weren't going to have sex until he found a new job. He then turned to me with the most excited look I have ever seen on his face and said "I am going to stay unemployed forever!" He was serious. FML

#19987101
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27015) - you deserved it (8311)

On 07/27/2012 at 9:45am - intimacy - by Nikki (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my husband and I were watching Lord of the Rings. My husband told me he sees the eye of Sauron every time he goes down on me. FML

#19986172
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23523) - you deserved it (3419)

On 07/26/2012 at 10:13pm - intimacy - by LOTRfail (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML

#19983117
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26036) - you deserved it (12373)

On 07/25/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my parents informed that the man I am going to marry made the newspaper, on page twelve. He is listed as a fugitive and there is a warrant out for his arrest. FML

#19982796
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24092) - you deserved it (3129)

On 07/25/2012 at 1:27am - misc - by strangebeans (woman) - United States

Today, I found out my late grandfather left me a significant amount of money in his will. I thought it was weird because he always acted like he hated me. When I got the envelope, there was $500,000 inside, all in Monopoly money. FML

#19961966
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34375) - you deserved it (2999)

On 07/20/2012 at 1:13am - money - by Rachel - United States

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10690) - you deserved it (36788)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I managed to bruise my nipple by closing an umbrella on it. The stupidity of the whole thing hurts almost as much as the injury. FML

#19936728
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18280) - you deserved it (4396)

On 07/14/2012 at 10:43am - health - by Anonymous - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

#19926709
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32587) - you deserved it (4115)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: