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APD16

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APD16
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2632
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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APD16's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my first day working at a milking parlor. As I crouched behind a cow to put on an udder cluster, I looked up and gasped just in time for the cow to crap on my face. FML

#35996
10 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39248) - you deserved it (5914)

On 02/13/2009 at 7:42am - animals - by abi_vet_student (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, I took my friend to the E.R. for an eye infection. While waiting, I proclaimed, "Why, Jesus?!" jokingly. Well, the gigantic biker sitting next to me, who had found religion in prison and is a born again Christian, was not pleased. He spent the next four hours trying to convert me. FML

#5942
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18957) - you deserved it (15282)

On 02/03/2009 at 5:48am - health - by mrb72 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had a wet dream. When I woke up, I was touching myself. Unfortunately, I also woke up to find that I had fallen asleep on the couch after eating too much at a family reunion. When I looked around the room, over 10 relatives were giving me nasty looks. FML

#4708
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33485) - you deserved it (7241)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:29pm - misc - by frankrizzo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I downloaded the 'Dark was the Night' compilation made for charity. I have no soul. FML

#2527
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3637) - you deserved it (20039)

On 01/25/2009 at 12:52pm - misc - by Champs - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML

#2423
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36030) - you deserved it (4894)

On 01/24/2009 at 10:14am - intimacy - by asdfasdf - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking for our bubblegum flavored "numbing" lotion to have some morning fun. We couldnt find it anywhere. After about 10 minutes, my little nephew comes from my room crying and drool coming out of his mouth. He smelt like bubblegum, his mouth and tongue were all numb. FML

#997
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28013) - you deserved it (7538)

On 01/12/2009 at 10:37am - intimacy - by LiLGeek - United States (California)

Today, it's been 2 weeks since I lost my virginity and I've already had sex with 3 guys. I think I'm a nympho. FML

#723
11 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9004) - you deserved it (67172)

On 01/07/2009 at 3:16am - intimacy - by sexaddict - Sent from mobile version

Today, the only man who has ever fallen in love with me is bald. FML

#677
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8408) - you deserved it (27512)

On 01/02/2009 at 6:09am - love - by joe - France (Auvergne)

Today, my girlfriend has big fake boobs, but gets offended when I tell her how much I like them. FML

#769
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31579) - you deserved it (5130)

On 01/01/2009 at 12:23am - intimacy - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I sat in the train and the old lady sitting next to me stares at my face. I ask her if she is ok and she starts yelling "Willy! It's you! Where have you been all this time?". The entire train trip went like this. FML

#593
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13823) - you deserved it (979)

On 12/25/2008 at 5:30am - misc - by LDF - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was browsing the internet and I found a picture of my girlfriend on uglypeople.com. FML

#568
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36090) - you deserved it (5065)

On 12/21/2008 at 8:44pm - intimacy - by HeatoN - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I was jacking off casually to a picture of my ex-girlfriend, when all of the sudden, my friend sends me an IM picture of a granny bending over which pops up on my screen. I think my sex life is ruined forever. FML

#539
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14350) - you deserved it (24304)

On 12/17/2008 at 11:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, whilst reading all 15 pages of this site, my French girlfriend asked me over my shoulder for translations, such as "What is buttsex?", "What is wanking?", and "What means farted?" FML

#513
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20948) - you deserved it (5609)

On 12/14/2008 at 8:14am - intimacy - by james - United Kingdom (London)

Today, we had some family over. A nasty need to wank seized me when I saw her: my 17-year-old cousin. I went to my parents' unoccupied bedroom. My sister's baby walkie-talkie was switched on, and the whole family heard me. FML

#37
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22075) - you deserved it (102685)

On 10/25/2008 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by VIVI -



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