Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

APD16

Search for a member

APD16

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2958
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

APD16's page activity

Visits<b>penguinhalo</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 3:37pm<b>odod777</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 6:51am<b>kaatieface</b> - the 12/28/2012 at 5:36am<b>raphanne</b> - the 07/24/2011 at 6:52pm

APD16's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

APD16's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at my bosses house for a company BBQ. Earlier I had taken muscle relaxants to calm my lower back pain. After a few drinks it was clear the alcohol and medication did not mix. I woke up few hours later to find out I had stripped naked and jumped into the 4 foot cake before passing out. FML

#706614
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28948) - you deserved it (74611)

On 03/30/2009 at 6:17pm - work - by Donzai (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my watch broke so I casually mentioned to my dad that I needed a new one. A little while later he hands me this really nice watch. He says, "Here, this one's been lying around for a while". It was the watch I gave him for Father's Day. FML

#593767
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71890) - you deserved it (4402)

On 03/25/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by regiftee (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was nude modeling for the first time for a life art class. The only criteria for the class was that I not move at all while being observed. After a few seconds I noticed a really hot girl drawing me. I got a hard on. FML

#442796
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75352) - you deserved it (27802)

On 03/18/2009 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Opplyst11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, my dad gave me a promise ring on my one year anniversary with my boyfriend and made me swear I would wait til marriage. Four hours later he walked in on us having sex in my bedroom. FML

#400298
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45839) - you deserved it (240198)

On 03/16/2009 at 10:19pm - intimacy - by thiswouldhappen. - United States (Florida)

Today, my physics teacher asked who had implants. I raised my hand. Then he asked me to show him the implants. Shocked at his request I called him a perv. I later discovered he meant dental implants as he was teaching x rays not breast implants. FML

#232961
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12339) - you deserved it (110346)

On 03/07/2009 at 8:40am - misc - by Noname - Pakistan (Islamabad)

Today, at a hard rock concert, a bunch of guys accidentally knocked down a port-a-potty while moshing. I was inside that port-a-potty. FML

#231694
157 comments

Today, I was telling my boyfriend I had fake orgasms all the time to piss him off. He replied: "that's okay, I'm f***ing three other girls." FML

#214447
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50452) - you deserved it (129956)

On 03/05/2009 at 1:01am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a customer opened with "you open bottles with them thangs?" I look around my desk for something he might confuse with an actual bottle opener. His girlfriend then informs me he is talking about my breasts. I work for a bank. FML

#176117
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41455) - you deserved it (3460)

On 03/01/2009 at 9:31pm - work - by bottlepoppin (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got my braces on. When we got in the car my dad looked over and said "well at least we dont have to worry about boys for the next two years." FML

#171168
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58216) - you deserved it (4113)

On 03/01/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by jajaja (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my teacher confiscated my cell phone for text messaging. He said he would give it back if the next text that I would receive was important. I prayed the guy I've been texting didn't send the dick pic he said he was going to. He did. FML

#160435
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27373) - you deserved it (95064)

On 02/28/2009 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by textfail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I emailed my boyfriend from work. Out of habit, I absent-mindedly entered my department into the "From" field. My boyfriend didn't notice when he replied. Now my entire department knows I want to "drop to my knees and suck him when I get home." And he plans to "finish on my face." FML

#133145
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14216) - you deserved it (66286)

On 02/25/2009 at 1:41pm - work - by foolishgirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I just studied for 13.5 hours completely outlining a book for history. Thirty minutes before the test, I realized I had been reading the wrong book. FML

#112701
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33324) - you deserved it (37904)

On 02/23/2009 at 10:32am - work - by Nic (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

#86179
737 comments

I agree, your life sucks (768192) - you deserved it (82701)

On 02/20/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by Mick (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, it was my first day working at a milking parlor. As I crouched behind a cow to put on an udder cluster, I looked up and gasped just in time for the cow to crap on my face. FML

#35996
10 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40816) - you deserved it (6151)

On 02/13/2009 at 7:42am - animals - by abi_vet_student (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, I took my friend to the E.R. for an eye infection. While waiting, I proclaimed, "Why, Jesus?!" jokingly. Well, the gigantic biker sitting next to me, who had found religion in prison and is a born again Christian, was not pleased. He spent the next four hours trying to convert me. FML

#5942
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21613) - you deserved it (16860)

On 02/03/2009 at 5:48am - health - by mrb72 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



FML's blog

  • AD_e's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang ! It's Friday once more and time for us to go on a magical mystery tour around the brain of yet another illustrator. This week, things have happened around the world that were so depressing, I don't…

Monday 18 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: