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ALlamaOnFire

Offline (the 06/28/2014 at 5:30pm) | Search for a member

ALlamaOnFire

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2788
  • Number of comments : 255
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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ALlamaOnFire's page activity

Visits<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 12:30am<b>moulchlo</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 10:10am<b>Bellatrix55</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 11:26am<b>pikawarriors</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 1:28am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 12:27pm<b>valkabow</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 8:47am<b>Draco295</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 11:54pm<b>TYRRELL</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 4:46pm<b>crosa19</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 1:11pm<b>incoherentrmblr</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 2:06am<b>FanOfAnimations</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 2:00pm<b>Annacakes72</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 11:32pm<b>cats54321</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 6:58pm<b>Luke1787</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 1:40am<b>nubbles10</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 12:14pm<b>jarrettd</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 2:25pm<b>Budderchook</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 9:40am<b>cracchiolo</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 10:52pm

ALlamaOnFire's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

See all of ALlamaOnFire's badges

ALlamaOnFire's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML

#14610612
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43946) - you deserved it (2996) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML

#14608705
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30723) - you deserved it (19929) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, while playing with my cat, she decided to give me a surprise nipple piercing with her claws. FML

#14579173
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24214) - you deserved it (4716)

On 01/14/2011 at 3:53pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was in the elevator with my female coworker and a very attractive teen in front of us. My coworker reached out and grabbed the boobs of the teen in front of us, and blamed it on me. I got yelled at, kneed in the crotch, and punched in the face. My coworker couldn't stop laughing. FML

#14416914
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33314) - you deserved it (3396)

On 01/01/2011 at 12:06am - work - by Chris - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to leave my one-night stand in my flat because I was giving a guest lecture at the local university. Halfway through, I hear someone sneaking in so I jokingly asked if they had a 'wild night out.' It was the guy I slept with. FML

#14119620
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10803) - you deserved it (37130)

On 12/07/2010 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by openmouthinsertfoot (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my friend peed her pants while we were sledding. I could feel it trickling down into my pants. FML

#14012574
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27011) - you deserved it (2508)

On 11/28/2010 at 3:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I shadowed an ultrasound technician for my future career. She did an ultrasound on me to show me how to do the job. I found out I was pregnant. FML

#13863853
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47704) - you deserved it (11829)

On 11/16/2010 at 10:34am - misc - by nicolette5785452 - United States (Ohio)

Today, my swim coach had me swim a 400 meter freestyle. Feeling a little sick near the end, I lifted my head to breathe, then burped, and threw up violently all in the pool. All my team mates screamed horrified running out of the pool, and now they have to drain it. I was told not to come back. FML

#13855888
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27624) - you deserved it (3561)

On 11/15/2010 at 7:19pm - health - by grlzze444 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, at work, I accidentally walked into a meeting at which the whole company was there but me. The meeting was about how they could legally fire me while paying as little severance as possible. I'm the CEO and the founder of the company. FML

#13825716
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41014) - you deserved it (3754)

On 11/13/2010 at 9:43am - work - by everythingWASperfect - Canada (Ontario)

Today, one of my husband's old college buddies came over for dinner. We reminisced about our college days, and he laughed as he told the story about my husband making up a friend, Marc Deveau, that he'd say he was visiting when he was cheating on his girlfriend. My husband still sees Marc Deveau. FML

#13798665
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58959) - you deserved it (3408) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/11/2010 at 3:40am - love - by Anonymous - France

Today, I started college after a night out. I'd got tipsy at the club and started dancing with a cute guy. He asked for my number. I didn't want to give it to him, so I gave him a rejection number. Guess who's the new professor for my bio class? And yes, he recognized me. FML

#13424544
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13667) - you deserved it (32248)

On 10/12/2010 at 7:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was conducting interviews and I could tell this particular candidate was really nervous, so I was extra nice. At the end, he was reluctant to shake my hand. On the way out I realised why: I had lost the top button on my low cut top, and he was nursing his appreciation of the view. FML

#13153381
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21641) - you deserved it (7589)

On 09/22/2010 at 4:49am - work - by pizzacat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I walked in the door and heard my husband calling me to the bedroom. I got a little excited, took my clothes off, and walked into the bedroom. I forgot our mortgagor was inspecting our house today. FML

#12898898
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15480) - you deserved it (29298)

On 09/04/2010 at 7:02am - intimacy - by Lewis - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my dad walked in on me singing "Bohemian Rhapsody", while spinning in circles with the cat in my arms. I thought I was home alone. FML

#12797830
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12604) - you deserved it (26230)

On 08/29/2010 at 12:54am - animals - by Hobbsie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to explain to my doctor and parents that I dislocated my shoulder while masturbating. FML

#12316575
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29629) - you deserved it (33483)

On 08/04/2010 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by kinky - United States (Virginia)



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