About ALlamaOnFire : This stuff is my life:
30 Seconds To Mars (echelon for life mofos :)),
My Chemical Romance,
Lord the Rings,
The Hobbit (CANNOT WAIT FOR THE 2ND MOVIE),
Merlin,
Red Dwarf,
Doctor Who,
Sherlock,
Anything by Derren Brown,
MARTIN FREEMAN
YDI master
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Today, I realized I've been confusing scenes from The Lord of the Rings with American history. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5357) - you deserved it (15724)
On 03/24/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by Avery - United States (California)
Today, I decided to hit on a very attractive girl. I guess I was too drunk to remember it was my family reunion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6199) - you deserved it (28959)
On 03/18/2012 at 7:41am - love - by Austin Franklin - United States
Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16423) - you deserved it (1206)
On 03/17/2012 at 10:41pm - misc - by vanorav (man) - United States (California)
Today, my therapist gave me some great self-sufficiency advice. It sounded familiar. When I got home I realized she had been quoting Christina Aguilera songs. For £100 an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18960) - you deserved it (2523)
On 03/13/2012 at 1:33pm - health - by PixieWrists - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)
Today, my family started their own version of the Hunger Games. With farts as their ammo, they've been tackling and gassing everyone until their victim "dies" by surrendering. My house is a flatulent war zone, and I fear waking up blind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18753) - you deserved it (1706)
On 02/18/2012 at 5:22pm - health - by district12 (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)
Today, my dog attacked me because I had a chicken costume on for a party. I'm currently in a hospital, dressed as a chicken, waiting for medical assistance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19180) - you deserved it (3030)
On 02/11/2012 at 5:19am - animals - by lulu - United States (Ohio)
Today, I got punched by a man for making fun of his stutter. I didn't. I stutter too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30810) - you deserved it (1579)
On 02/02/2012 at 11:00pm - misc - by Sam (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend referred to his penis as 'The Eye of Sauron'. It didn't help when he pulled down his foreskin, pointed it in my direction and said 'I see you'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25694) - you deserved it (3780)
On 01/18/2012 at 1:29pm - intimacy - by anon - United Kingdom
Today, while I was peacefully sleeping, I felt a hand suddenly slap my forehead. Then fingers began to press against my mouth, then nose, then eyes. I finally woke up to my girlfriend laughing hysterically. She'd confused me with her clock-radio. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20308) - you deserved it (2455) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I received a letter from the state saying my 14-year-old daughter is now legally recognized as a male. I have no idea what happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35937) - you deserved it (3355)
Today, I was so bored that I began searching for videos of people popping their pimples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6907) - you deserved it (31508)
On 12/29/2011 at 7:03am - misc - by nolife - United States
Today, I was driving home from work when I saw the woman in the car in front of me throw something out the window. Only when it landed on my windshield did I realize what it was. A bloody tampon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36167) - you deserved it (1685)
On 12/27/2011 at 5:32pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I walked into my elderly grandmother's trailer, used the bathroom and went to wash my hands. She had a soft spot in the floor that she covered with a bathmat. I fell through. Right leg up to my hip in the floor, boobs stuck on the counter. My husband and grandmother stood there laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18448) - you deserved it (1912)
On 12/27/2011 at 12:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, after returning to the UK from my Australian holiday, I was fired from my job for no reason. My boss told me he'd waited till I'd returned to do it. I could have stayed in Australia with my mates traveling for a year if I had been fired before I left. I'm sure he did it on purpose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23150) - you deserved it (1734)
On 12/14/2011 at 11:53am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Birmingham)
Today, I found out that the gentle, adorable oral surgeon who took out my wisdom teeth last year was recently arrested for rape. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24011) - you deserved it (1698)
On 12/03/2011 at 1:43am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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