A83

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Offline (the 09/10/2014 at 1:17am)

A83

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 17 August 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11422
  • Number of comments : 113
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About A83 : A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

A83's page activity

Visits<b>BlondBombShll88</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 5:13pm<b>sameboysamesame</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 1:42am<b>Soccerboi15</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 10:17pm<b>ziul123</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 11:57am<b>w_chen2511</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 9:12am<b>OriginalAndBest</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 8:42am<b>Tyde</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 1:49pm<b>razi1</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 10:43pm<b>anniesje</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 7:03pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 1:55am<b>xxdesi93xx</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 3:25pm<b>im_hyper</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 6:47pm<b>Kaylee_Knudsen</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 9:23am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 8:16am<b>byramzd</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 4:59pm<b>LtBoom</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 3:43am<b>Dennisse_47</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 12:03am<b>hawkeyepeirce</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 5:32pm

A83's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of A83's badges

A83's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

by Bailey / 08/22/2010 at 2:58am / United States (Nebraska) / Kids

Today, my husband discovered that whispering anything in my ear will turn me on. He turned to me and whispered 'cheeseburger' in my ear. Unfortunately, I moaned. Now he now laughs about it with our roommate. FML

by Indigo_Kitten / 08/07/2010 at 9:05pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I brought my boyfriend of a year and a half to meet my parents. Turns out he dated my mom. This should be a fun dinner. FML

by highlandgirl10 / 07/21/2010 at 4:31pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I was walking with my girlfriend of a year and a half on the beach. Everything was fine until she saw a plane with a banner behind it saying "Cassie, will you marry me?" She said yes. I didn't order a plane. FML

by ManInTrouble / 03/16/2010 at 12:50am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was hit on by an older man. I rolled my eyes at him and informed him I was 16, hoping that would get him to leave me alone. He shrugged and said, "We're both human." FML

by creepster / 02/10/2010 at 8:39pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, after months of trying, my wife of seven years told me she is finally pregnant. I'm going to be an uncle. FML

by Anonymous / 01/06/2010 at 10:17pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2009 at 7:52pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, a Milkbone commercial came on TV. At the end of it, they whistle and throw a Milkbone across the screen, prompting my 100lb German Shepherd to leap off the couch and run head on into my new plasma screen TV. FML

by doglover / 11/03/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my son's hamster died. It was overweight and got stuck in its plastic tube. My 6 year old son came downstairs to me smashing a plastic tube with a dead hamster in it on the kitchen table. He thinks I killed it. FML

by freylero / 10/27/2009 at 3:35pm / United Kingdom (Greater London) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went back home. My drunk mother was screaming at my drunk step-dad about a fight that happened four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "orgasm face" while the neighbors were dancing outside, coked out and naked. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2009 at 12:55am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my college roommate whom I've never met moved in. Good thing I wasn't completely naked, playing with myself on the couch when he walked in. That would've been awkward. FML

by mrboston / 09/01/2009 at 7:44pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

by Michelle / 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it I decided to whisper in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I hear behind me, "I am." FML

by unbelievable208 / 08/05/2009 at 1:28am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

by I_Am_The_Edge / 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

by sucks / 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals