A83

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Offline (the 09/10/2014 at 1:17am)

A83

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 17 August 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11351
  • Number of comments : 113
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About A83 : A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

A83's page activity

Visits<b>BlondBombShll88</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 5:13pm<b>sameboysamesame</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 1:42am<b>Soccerboi15</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 10:17pm<b>ziul123</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 11:57am<b>w_chen2511</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 9:12am<b>OriginalAndBest</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 8:42am<b>Tyde</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 1:49pm<b>razi1</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 10:43pm<b>anniesje</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 7:03pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 1:55am<b>xxdesi93xx</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 3:25pm<b>im_hyper</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 6:47pm<b>Kaylee_Knudsen</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 9:23am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 8:16am<b>byramzd</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 4:59pm<b>LtBoom</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 3:43am<b>Dennisse_47</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 12:03am<b>hawkeyepeirce</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 5:32pm

A83's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of A83's badges

A83's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML

by Andrew / 04/20/2011 at 12:31pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

by bham boy / 04/20/2011 at 4:10am / Work

Today, I'm a student vet. Part of my holiday work is to gain experience working at a dairy. A cow came on to the platform for me to inject her udder. As I was bent over, she decided to take a dump. Onto my left eyeball. FML

by Anonymous / 04/20/2011 at 3:27am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Animals

Today, my cat took a shit in my toaster. FML

by Anonymous / 04/19/2011 at 10:21pm / United States / Animals

Today, I was on my way home on my bike when a lady in a 4WD cut me off while beeping her horn and calling me a "stupid f**ker who should get a proper education." In her car, she was smoking, and her three children weren't wearing seat belts. FML

by faza4327 / 04/06/2011 at 3:43am / Australia (South Australia) / Transportation

Today, my fiancé and I visited his family for dinner. The entire time I was there, his mother and sister had an in depth conversation about how attractive his ex girlfriends were and how they got along with them so well. FML

by BrisbaneCoop / 04/04/2011 at 1:13pm / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I heard the four most dreaded words known to man during my first time: "Is it in yet?" It was. FML

by Johntheladdo / 03/29/2011 at 1:26pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the mall with my friends, when a creepy man sat at the table next to us, and started rubbing his crotch, his gaze never leaving my feet. FML

by ewww / 03/25/2011 at 1:31pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was at the mall with my friends, when a creepy man sat at the table next to us, and started rubbing his crotch, his gaze never leaving my feet. FML

by ewww / 03/25/2011 at 1:31pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got 2 creams for a skin condition. The one for my face says "Don't expose skin to sun after use of this product". The one for the rest of my body says "This product relies on exposure to the sun". In other words, I have to be outside as much as I can, naked and with a box on my head. FML

by FromNL / 03/25/2011 at 8:22am / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Health

Today, I went to the hospital as my girlfriends emergency contact. When I saw her, she was under a blanket because she had no pants. She had a seizure in a guy's bed and he brought her here. He's here and she wants us both to stay. FML

by tannerpaul / 03/24/2011 at 9:30pm / Love

Today, I annoyed my friend by texting him 'meow' over and over at random times of the day because when he's drunk he meows in his sleep. Apparently a great way to get back at me was to tell my parents I wasn't a virgin and that I got high on Wednesday. He had pictures to prove it for both. FML

by Fcuked / 03/23/2011 at 12:40am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

Today, my wife created a "Points Reward" system for the privilege of sex. 10 points for doing the dishes, 20 for the laundry, etc. How many points do I need before I can have sex with her? 2300. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2011 at 10:59am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my son was on Facebook while he was supposed to be studying. He called me a liar and accused me of making up excuses to chew him out. How do I know he was online? He liked and commented on a video I posted. My son is a dumbass. FML

by parenting_failure / 03/20/2011 at 12:10pm / Kids

Today, I was walking with my crush, and I told him how I felt. As soon as I turned to him, a bird shit on my face. FML

by crazystar69 / 03/09/2011 at 1:19pm / United States (California) / Love