About A713 : INTP.
A713's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
A713's favorite FMLs
Today, my condo board refused to lift the new policy requiring pet owners to carry dogs in common areas because someone's dog is peeing in the hall. I can't physically carry my two dogs, so I'm now forced to wheel them through the building in a borrowed baby stroller. FML
by Slivered / 11/18/2009 at 4:50am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
Today, I was the paramedic at the scene of a car accident. One lady was hurt, and we had trouble getting any information from her as she was sobbing. I radioed in the details and said "...a lady in her mid 30's, ETA 10 minutes." She stopped crying, slapped me, and said, "I'm 28." FML
by Paramedic / 11/17/2009 at 6:16am / United Kingdom (Rochdale) / Work
Today, after months of trying to potty train my son, he finally told me he used the potty. I went to the bathroom to check. There was nothing there. So I asked him "Where did you go to the potty?". He then grabbed my hand and took me to the cat's litter box. My son has successfully litter trained himself. FML
by anonymous / 11/16/2009 at 1:00am / Japan (Okinawa) / Kids
by JJ / 11/13/2009 at 10:07pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love
Today, I went through with my elaborate plans to propose to my girlfriend with creativity. I took her skydiving and proposed in midair. She rejected. Why? She wanted a more "traditional" proposal. FML
by rejectedmidair / 11/13/2009 at 2:14am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was falling asleep on my desk, my head on my fist. My elbow slipped off the edge of the desk and I punched myself, leaving a fist mark on my cheek. At school, people think my parents hit me. My parents think I'm getting bullied at school. No one believes the actual story. FML
by Dobby123 / 11/08/2009 at 3:44pm / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Miscellaneous
by oldlady / 11/07/2009 at 7:38pm / United States (New York) / Health
by Anonymous / 11/05/2009 at 10:29pm / Australia (Queensland) / Work
Today, a Milkbone commercial came on TV. At the end of it, they whistle and throw a Milkbone across the screen, prompting my 100lb German Shepherd to leap off the couch and run head on into my new plasma screen TV. FML
by doglover / 11/03/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went on a date, and within the first five minutes, he said, "Before we go any further and get anymore serious, you need to know a few things, I have kissed a guy drunk because it was a dare, and have a $400 silk rose Victoria's Secret blanket." FML
by Shawty / 11/02/2009 at 10:41pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was working at Tim Hortons. A lady was in line, and she couldnt make up her mind. 20 minutes later she finally decided to get something, and she reached in her pocket. I was hoping it was a tip, but she gave me a coupon for a haircut. FML
by justin_99 / 11/02/2009 at 8:15pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by notsohappyniece / 11/02/2009 at 11:10am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
Today, I decided I'd take a nap in my car because I got to work very early. As I was waking up from my nap, I saw a cop looking right at me. Turns out, a lady who'd parked her car right next to mine after I was asleep had called the cops on me because she thought I was dead. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2009 at 9:09pm / United States (Maryland) / Transportation
Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2009 at 4:03am / United States (Oregon) / Health
by Queen_of_Night / 10/27/2009 at 5:57pm / United States (Texas) / Love