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96bart96

Offline (the 09/25/2014 at 11:07pm) | Search for a member

96bart96

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 29 September 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1321
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About 96bart96 : Hello creepers!

........move along now

96bart96's page activity

Visits<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 4:32pm<b>cskipgolfer2013</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 8:21pm<b>roro_superloser</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 1:40pm<b>Ishq786</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 9:33pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 3:33pm<b>larson15</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 11:48pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 2:21pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/27/2013 at 11:36am<b>goalie01</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 5:42am<b>Mr_Leading</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 3:00am<b>Bryankaoz</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 11:09pm<b>army_of_misfits</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 8:22pm<b>Halie0119</b> - the 05/17/2013 at 3:25pm<b>bendboys</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 8:39pm<b>red1116</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 12:27pm<b>lochiamochia</b> - the 03/13/2013 at 11:38pm<b>Dennisse_47</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 12:07am<b>GabrielleFrance</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 6:58am

96bart96's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

96bart96's favorite FMLs

Today, I was going so slow in traffic that my GPS asked me if I wanted to switch to pedestrian mode. FML

#20801861
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42227) - you deserved it (7596)

On 07/24/2013 at 9:31pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML

#20786268
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44266) - you deserved it (32392) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/16/2013 at 9:18am - health - by Aliiiice (woman) - France (Haute-Normandie)

Today, my crush kissed me for the first time. However, my hair was falling into my face and getting in the way. No problem, I wear a wig so without thinking, I simply removed it. I don't think he'll kiss me again anytime soon. FML

#20755685
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47360) - you deserved it (18255)

On 06/30/2013 at 6:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while volunteering at a local museum, I politely told an elderly gentleman to have a nice day. He responded by yelling "NO" and storming off. Everyone looked at me like I was some sort of monster. FML

#20741264
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37883) - you deserved it (2840)

On 06/22/2013 at 5:16pm - misc - by me - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked in on my grandma playing with herself. Every time I close my eyes, I see things that no mortal was ever meant to see. FML

#20739366
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68827) - you deserved it (6551)

On 06/21/2013 at 5:00pm - intimacy - by bleeeaaaaaacccccchhhhhhhh (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML

#20701323
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68041) - you deserved it (4151)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after buying 3 new alarm clocks, I finally decided to video tape myself all night to figure out if my alarm clock was broken or if I was oversleeping. Turns out I wake up around 4am each day and turn them off without remembering. FML

#20700571
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50376) - you deserved it (5996)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:06am - misc - by sleepy momma - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, wanting to do something nice for my dad, I mowed the lawn. He grounded me for "emasculating" him. FML

#20699633
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47773) - you deserved it (4014)

On 06/01/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65595) - you deserved it (18708)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

#20695159
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62324) - you deserved it (4986)

On 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by life insurance for 1 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was sending intimate pictures to my girlfriend and accidentally sent one to my best friend. He sent me one back. FML

#20690661
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55866) - you deserved it (32873)

On 05/28/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by Abrams52 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I thought the public restroom I was in was empty, so I started rapping. I realized the room was not empty when, recognizing the song, the person one stall over joined in. FML

#20677562
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27181) - you deserved it (39367)

On 05/21/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by crappingrapping - United States

Today, I tried on a new perfume. When my boyfriend hugged me, he commented that I smelled like his mom. I don't know who was more surprised by the simultaneous bulge in his pants. FML

#20668540
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56334) - you deserved it (4767)

On 05/17/2013 at 3:21am - intimacy - by Uncomfortable (woman) -

Today, my stalker ex girlfriend turned up at my wedding, uninvited, wearing a wedding dress. FML

#20655660
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86512) - you deserved it (5471)

On 05/11/2013 at 2:25am - love - by tdrtnlz - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)



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