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924halle

Offline (the 11/24/2014 at 6:45pm) | Search for a member

924halle

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 13 June 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 442
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About 924halle : I like bay area California and Green Day. DFTBA.

924halle's page activity

Visits<b>JarrinAleesa</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 6:23pm<b>thorn0014</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 12:03am<b>twinkletoes747</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 2:56am<b>DjeePee</b> - the 06/14/2012 at 4:05pm

924halle's FML badges

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924halle's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27989) - you deserved it (3169)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

#21290417
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37618) - you deserved it (10610)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:36am - intimacy - by jay-frey96 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I started my job selling perfume in a department store. I decided to be creative and sprayed a little perfume towards the first person who walked by. She had an allergic reaction, and an ambulance had to be called. FML

#21281002
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19450) - you deserved it (37583)

On 10/19/2014 at 10:24am - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31422) - you deserved it (14448)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a round of applause. Too bad it was from my thighs as I went down the stairs. FML

Today, a middle-aged customer tried to pay for a $2 ice cream bar with a credit card. It was declined, so he made me swipe it again. Declined. "Quit touching the metal strip," he scowled. I held the outer edge of it and swiped. Declined. He then bitched me out as his mother paid for him. FML

Today, it's my birthday, and everyone, family and friends, forgot. Except my dog who left me a present on my bed. FML

#21253357
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38842) - you deserved it (2761)

On 09/06/2014 at 11:06pm - animals - by Meowit (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out that my sister licks all the flavoring off Doritos and puts them back in the bag. FML

#21252905
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37542) - you deserved it (2736)

On 09/06/2014 at 9:35am - misc - by UghDude (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40967) - you deserved it (9498)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

#21245090
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36727) - you deserved it (13777)

On 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm - kids - by JackieD (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned "The bitch on the pot." FML

#21241016
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43631) - you deserved it (16587)

On 08/19/2014 at 2:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40947) - you deserved it (25782)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

#21235686
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22342) - you deserved it (36541)

On 08/12/2014 at 6:21am - kids - by jake - Australia (New South Wales)



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