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1happymummy

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1happymummy
  • Town/Country : Heckington, Uk
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 814
  • Number of comments : 146
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About 1happymummy : English country bumpkin, mum of one, deliberately inflamitory.

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1happymummy's favorite FMLs

Today, a telemarketer found me so weird that he hung up on me. FML

#13861798
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19390) - you deserved it (7430)

On 11/16/2010 at 3:07am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After about minutes of freaking out and explaining on how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was best thus far. FML

#13787466
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43595) - you deserved it (16158)

On 11/10/2010 at 5:28am - health - by youreajoker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I took my four year old son to the playground. When it was time to go, he squirmed out of my arms back to the jungle gym. Not being the type of mother to put up with bad behavior, I swatted his rear and told him we had to go. That's when I realized I'd just spanked the wrong child who was wearing the same coat as my son. FML

#13726348
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12603) - you deserved it (41225)

On 11/05/2010 at 1:29pm - kids - by lilmamma - United States (California)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my fingers got stuck between the wall and headboard. Screaming, he thought I was enjoying the sex and kept going even harder. I have 3 broken fingers. FML

#13418490
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43582) - you deserved it (7927)

On 10/12/2010 at 8:57am - intimacy - by fungettingdressed - United States

Today, as I was leaving the office, I heard my very cute coworker behind me say "Hey gorgeous, where are you off to?" I turned around with a smile and said "About to hit up happy hour." He was on the phone with his wife. I'm calling in sick tomorrow. FML

#13274240
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19283) - you deserved it (7947)

On 10/01/2010 at 7:48am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I superglued my headphones back together. They weren't dry before I put them back in my ears. FML

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML

#12082068
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16358) - you deserved it (66357)

On 07/24/2010 at 6:53am - misc - by GirlishMan1883897 (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my grandfather died. The last thing he said to me was "You smell awful." I work in a fish store. FML

#11377747
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38080) - you deserved it (4412)

On 06/22/2010 at 9:49am - misc - by Mangler (man) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, I found out my 19 year old daughter is pregnant. The father is a toss up between my 45 year-old best friend, and the 30 year old guy who cleans our pool. FML

#11225858
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50555) - you deserved it (5536)

On 06/15/2010 at 9:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while in line at the waterpark, I looked down to find my 3 year old daughter chewing on a used band-aid. FML

#11056176
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35754) - you deserved it (6515)

On 06/08/2010 at 12:07pm - kids - by sarahfromthesouth - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a huge bill through the post. It turns out that my elderly mother made the vet come out to my house to see the dog while I was out, because she was scared of the little growths she had found on his body. They were nipples. FML

#10925593
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25148) - you deserved it (1697)

On 06/02/2010 at 7:15pm - money - by dogshavenipples (man) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I realized explosive diarrhea can happen, and at the most inopportune times, such as on the day of MY wedding. At the alter while my husband said his vows. FML

#8658648
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50988) - you deserved it (2575)

On 02/26/2010 at 5:23am - love - by pain (woman) - Japan

Today, I was waiting downstairs at my boyfriend's house as he got ready to go. His mom came over and said she was so glad her son had met me, that I made him really happy. I smiled thinking how nice that was of her to say. She then continued, "Still, he tells me anal is a no?" FML

#8515469
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19003) - you deserved it (2281)

On 02/21/2010 at 12:16pm - intimacy - by charliesangel123 (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I was letting my boyfriend of 4 years tie me up and do stuff to me. After finishing on my face, he then left. My parents had to untie me. FML

#7609277
331 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34957) - you deserved it (9144)

On 01/27/2010 at 8:35am - intimacy - by chanclepants - Sent from mobile version

Today, my grandpa, a married high school teacher, got arrested for having an inappropriate relationship with a female student. Hearing the news, I called my grandma crying. Not only is he most likely going to jail, but in seven months I will have a new aunt who is eighteen years younger than me. FML

#7594942
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31684) - you deserved it (1886)

On 01/26/2010 at 7:09pm - misc - by newniece (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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