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1happymummy

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1happymummy

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 3 February 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1477
  • Number of comments : 147
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About 1happymummy : English country bumpkin, mum of one, waiting until I rule the world.

1happymummy's page activity

Visits<b>SwagBasket</b> - yesterday at 3:13pm<b>DaRooster333</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 11:34pm<b>RandomPersonOk</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 1:41am<b>sarge1911</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 3:01pm<b>dustydick</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 2:14pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 6:43pm<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 2:03am<b>ermagherdaturdis</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 6:27am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 8:16am<b>subduedbeast</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 1:24pm<b>kampff</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 3:07am<b>starcaller17</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 5:39pm<b>IAreBox</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 5:18pm<b>morondon000</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 1:22pm<b>TheFirstHipster</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 7:23pm<b>AHandsomeCookie</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 3:52pm<b>XFails13</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 1:03am<b>somthingstupd</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 11:52pm

1happymummy's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of 1happymummy's badges

1happymummy's favorite FMLs

Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to hide in the washroom closet while I was taking a piss. I wasn't pissing, I was wanking. FML

#21281971
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36986) - you deserved it (11202)

On 10/20/2014 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by John (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that when I asked my buddy to make sure my girlfriend was safe while I was abroad, he really did; he even used a condom. FML

#21268339
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43705) - you deserved it (3992)

On 09/30/2014 at 1:45pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47853) - you deserved it (3537)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

#21265897
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35767) - you deserved it (3656)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41657) - you deserved it (11327)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was watching "My Strange Addiction". The woman featured ate rocks. While judging her weird habit, I realised I was chewing on a coat-hanger the whole time. FML

#21256247
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32766) - you deserved it (12551)

On 09/11/2014 at 10:57am - misc - by ayeayeboy19 - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML

#20950555
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42899) - you deserved it (7991)

On 11/08/2013 at 6:02pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up with an engagement ring on my left hand. The same one I refused last month. My boyfriend apparently waited for me to be drunk to propose again last night, and has already posted the pics on Facebook. FML

#20427625
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38345) - you deserved it (14561)

On 12/28/2012 at 10:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad looked at him and said, "Nice outfit, but it's a little late for Halloween." Before I could intervene, my boyfriend said that joke had been done to death, to which my dad retorted, "Yeah, so has your mum." Instant fistfight. FML

#20144826
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29207) - you deserved it (2995)

On 11/02/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by for fuck sake dad (woman) - Ireland (Limerick)

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

#20111886
521 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75274) - you deserved it (8800)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:30am - kids - by wdunn69733 - United States (Georgia)

Today, in the middle of what had to be the most amazing blowjob I've ever had in my life, my girlfriend had a mental breakdown and began weeping on top of my cock. FML

#20070700
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31236) - you deserved it (7524)

On 09/13/2012 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by blueballs (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML

#20027025
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33348) - you deserved it (1529)

On 08/17/2012 at 8:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found out the guy I've been crushing on for many years thinks he's a werewolf. FML

#19536972
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24666) - you deserved it (4272)

On 04/27/2012 at 11:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

#19506149
428 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42105) - you deserved it (3836)

On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon



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