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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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1NinjaPaper1

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1NinjaPaper1
  • Town/Country : Canada
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9497
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About 1NinjaPaper1 : I am addicted to this website! It's one of the things I check every day along with the online comics I'm following (ie: Wapsi square, LICD, LFG, Id, etc.) and facebook! I moderate the FML's when I have nothing else to, and that's about it, I think :P

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1NinjaPaper1's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing hide and seek with my eight year old cousin. For the past two turns, he had been hiding in the bathroom. I saw the bathroom lights on, yet again, and opened the door with a triumphant "AHA!" It was my Grandma, taking a smelly dump. FML

#5424247 (69)

I agree, your life sucks (12021) - you deserved it (24428)

On 09/23/2009 at 6:23am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore

Today, my girlfriend beat me at ping pong, twenty to three. She said I let her win because I don't respect her, then stormed out of the room. I'm just really bad at ping pong. FML

#5423695 (75)

I agree, your life sucks (30247) - you deserved it (2836)

On 09/23/2009 at 4:14am - love - by garrett (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after months of enduring my neighbors relentlessly yapping schnauzer, Molly, I moved into a new building. I was greeted by my new neighbor and her yapping rat terrier, Molly. FML

#5413899 (94)

I agree, your life sucks (30056) - you deserved it (2528)

On 09/22/2009 at 2:10pm - misc - by bellaellaella (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was giving a speech to my 300 some-odd person class. All throughout it, people had been giggling and cackling while I was speaking. I soon realized that my pants had been unzipped. I accidentally fell asleep with all my underwear in the washer last night and had gone commando that day. FML

#5288482 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (27889) - you deserved it (14227)

On 09/16/2009 at 6:21am - misc - by BluesMan1990 (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I had an art class with my girlfriend. The teacher assigned "anti-cards", or cards for unusual or bad occasions. My girlfriend decided to make a "break-up" card, and I helped her write the poem inside it. After class, she gave it to me. FML

#5251989 (62)

I agree, your life sucks (32497) - you deserved it (4347)

On 09/14/2009 at 2:54pm - love - by UnluckyArtist (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went on a blind date with a guy who talked about himself in the 3rd person. Seriously. FML

#5219515 (214)

I agree, your life sucks (37167) - you deserved it (4365)

On 09/13/2009 at 12:15am - love - by blind_date (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She later came into the T-Mobile that I work at to return the Sidekick that I bought for her. I had to transfer her account to a new Iphone. She got the Iphone from her new boyfriend, who works across the street from me. FML

#2073712 (220)

I agree, your life sucks (53040) - you deserved it (3077)

On 05/19/2009 at 4:09am - love - by SKuser (man) - China (Beijing)

Today, after a long night of partying, I was hanging out with this girl I really like. I was feeling really hungover, so we were just sitting at the park. Randomly, she confessed to me that she's liked me since the day she met me. Out of excitement and hungoverness, I throw up on her shoes. FML

#2071351 (94)

I agree, your life sucks (36046) - you deserved it (14545)

On 05/19/2009 at 1:16am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, at work, I decided to try and impress this girl walking behind me by holding the door open for her. As she was walking through, I inadvertently pulled the door too hard. It slammed against the wall and ricochet back, hitting her right in the face. FML

#2049243 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (30887) - you deserved it (13192)

On 05/18/2009 at 1:25pm - misc - by poop (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got really excited at work over a deal I was about to close. I got up and started performing a rather obscene hip thrust only to notice a client sitting in the glass meeting room. FML

#2044978 (63)

I agree, your life sucks (7033) - you deserved it (35463)

On 05/18/2009 at 8:04am - work - by hipthrustdude (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I was sitting next to this really cute guy in choir class. Trying to make conversation, I asked him what his favorite song was. He replied "Leave Me Alone". I asked him who it was by and he said, "It's not a song, I just want you to leave me alone". FML

#1963959 (78)

I agree, your life sucks (19872) - you deserved it (5313)

On 05/15/2009 at 2:35pm - misc - by jayden5 (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I went to a store to buy pants for a new job. A really hot guy helped me get a pair down from a high shelf so I could try them on. He had flirted with me so I hurried in the fitting room so I could go talk to him. Note to self: Check to see if you have pants on after trying on clothes. FML

#1953704 (103)

I agree, your life sucks (7577) - you deserved it (34343)

On 05/15/2009 at 12:32am - misc - by sweet92 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was smoking a cigarette in my backyard while my parents were out, because I'm not allowed to smoke. While smoking, my parents came home unexpectedly. In a rush, I flicked it over the fence, and it landed in my neighbor's hair. It was still lit. FML

#1952694 (223)

I agree, your life sucks (6150) - you deserved it (46344)

On 05/15/2009 at 12:05am - misc - by OuttaNowhere81 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was so totally stressed out at work that I took my car into the park and reclined my seat and shut my eyes. Soon I noticed the soothing sounds of raindrops on my car and I felt a little better for once. I opened my eyes to see that a bunch of birds had crapped all over my car. FML

#1935923 (44)

I agree, your life sucks (27156) - you deserved it (2059)

On 05/14/2009 at 5:09pm - work - by overlandparkmommie (woman) - United States

Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML

#1923265 (397)

I agree, your life sucks (86770) - you deserved it (7138)

On 05/14/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Flicker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)