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1990TD's favorite FMLs
Today, I was shopping with my baby daughter when an older woman came up to me. She glared and said, "You know, if you kids learned how to keep your legs closed, you wouldn't be a mother at 16." I'm 25. FML
by notateen / 11/13/2009 at 3:26pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, before having morning sex, my girlfriend for over a year whispers to me "Do that thing you did at the Halloween party". There was no morning sex as I reminded her that I was sick with the flu then and didn't go with her to the party. FML
by James / 11/05/2009 at 11:38am / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
Today, I spent the night with my guy, whom I hadn't seen in ages. In the middle of sex, he answered his phone, told me to be quiet, talked to the girl on the other end about how boring his day was, then left the room to finish talking to her. When he came back he asked if I felt like swallowing. FML
by dtmfa / 10/31/2009 at 12:31am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by bunny / 08/16/2009 at 9:58am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/22/2009 at 7:29am / Netherlands (Gelderland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I celebrated my 21st birthday. My boyfriend of almost 3 years gave me a big pink vibrator. Thinking it was a joke I said: "I won't need this as long as I have you!" His reply: "That's what I wanted to talk to you about." FML
by mylifesucks / 04/18/2009 at 3:20am / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Love
- Today, my best friend got a new boyfriend. She asked him what he wanted for his upcoming birthday,… Today, along with my virginity, my boyfriend took my laptop, iPhone, TV, and most of the food in my… Today, I went to the mall with my daughter. She asked me if she could go see Santa, so I said yes.…
- Today, my boyfriend wanted to show me that he listened to me yesterday: I said that I loved unusual… Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was… Today, I’m a bus driver in Paris. A guy got on with a sheep. I told him that you can’t take the bus…