1234five

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1234five

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5987
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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1234five's page activity

Visits<b>playhard_51</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 11:05pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 7:52pm<b>sofakingmexican</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 1:23am<b>thisguy184</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 11:28am<b>cecilk</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 11:13am<b>Katiekhalifa</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 10:00am<b>jaxleigh</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 4:43pm<b>Cian_1</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 7:36pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 2:52am<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/25/2009 at 4:57pm<b>seiera</b> - the 08/12/2009 at 7:35pm<b>56578</b> - the 07/05/2009 at 10:22pm<b>MtDewAddict</b> - the 07/05/2009 at 11:55am<b>Watchmaker</b> - the 07/04/2009 at 7:12pm<b>gingey101</b> - the 06/23/2009 at 12:03pm<b>mcsnelly</b> - the 05/29/2009 at 10:56pm<b>ibabyd0llaz</b> - the 05/29/2009 at 6:44pm<b>username666</b> - the 05/29/2009 at 4:59pm

1234five's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

1234five's favorite FMLs

Today, I was a TA watching the class take a test. I didn't realize that the projector was still on while I was searching the Internet. They watched me google "chronic itchy anus". FML

by yellowjacket_34 / 11/13/2009 at 12:47pm / United States (Montana) / Health

Today, I flew to see the guy that I've been in love with for 3 years. We spent the day at Walmart. To buy a plunger. After I blocked up the toilet. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2009 at 9:40pm / United States (Iowa) / Love

Today, a person came into McDonald's, where I work. They ordered a happy meal. As they were an adult, I assumed the meal was for their child, who wasn't with them. When I asked if the toy was for a boy or a girl, they said the toy was for them. I still had to ask if it was for a boy or a girl. FML

by paris78 / 10/17/2009 at 8:04pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my little sister was playing with her building blocks. All of a sudden, she began to cry and held her finger out to me. Assuming she had hurt it, I kissed it better, and tasted something odd on my lips. Turns out she wasn't hurt, she was crying because she had touched cat vomit. FML

by Anonymous / 10/07/2009 at 11:22pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML

by beya / 08/31/2009 at 6:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I was getting ready for a date. I spent extra time getting ready in the shower, making sure I was all shaved. I was shaving my upper lip to make sure I didn't have a mustache. I cut my lip really badly, leaving the most noticable razor cut on my face for my date. I'm a girl. FML

by dajfleasd / 07/25/2009 at 6:22pm / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were on the phone. He started talking dirty, and saying how horny he was, etc. So I decided to play along and said "I want you to picture me naked, baby." All of a sudden I heard a huge sigh. He responded, "Ew, that just killed it." FML

by picturemenakedbaby / 07/21/2009 at 6:42am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I was sitting at my desk eating cereal with my cat sleeping on my lap. I got a really funny text and I started laughing hysterically, and spilled my cereal all over my cat. I'll let you know how my legs, arms, neck and face heal up. FML

by Teylot / 06/28/2009 at 5:30pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Animals

Today, my mom and I rented a hotel room. She decided to go to bed, while I watched MythBusters. Apparently, my mom got hot while she slept. She threw the covers off of herself and pulled up her night-gown. I turned to find out that my mother does not wear underwear when she sleeps. FML

by ZAS / 06/15/2009 at 3:45am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked a very cute fireman for his number "just in case I needed him to come to my rescue"... He told me "Yeah sure!" and scribbled it down. After he walked away I read his note: "911". FML

by Noname / 02/24/2009 at 5:57pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I complimented my mom with "Hey, I think you lost some weight." She replied with "Yeah, I think you found it." FML

by Kristina / 02/18/2009 at 4:09pm / United States (New York) / Health