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1217jonathan's favorite FMLs
Today, my girlfriend wanted to try something new in the bedroom, so she got an assortment of different sized cock rings. She laughed when the one we were trying to use kept falling off, and said to try a smaller one. It was the smallest in the set. FML
by microlovin / 07/28/2013 at 3:45am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Jes_jes18 / 05/02/2013 at 2:27pm / United States / Love
Today, I was at the gas station with my grandma. After I slid her card and began to pump, I convinced her that it was a lot easier and more convenient to pay at the pump with your credit card instead of paying inside. She yelled as I realized I went $20 over what she had to spend. FML
by sorrygranny / 01/21/2013 at 11:11am / United States / Money
by Anonymous / 03/30/2011 at 12:37pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
Today, I was hanging out with the guy I like. All of a sudden, he pulls out a small vial of his blood to give to me, proving his undying love. Curious, I asked where he had gotten the blood. His answer? A razor blade. In his nose. FML
by radicaloser / 03/25/2011 at 4:50am / United States (Oregon) / Health
Today, I went to the hospital as my girlfriends emergency contact. When I saw her, she was under a blanket because she had no pants. She had a seizure in a guy's bed and he brought her here. He's here and she wants us both to stay. FML
by omg / 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
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- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I asked a customer to send me via e-mail the image he wanted me to print. He said, "I don't…